A
male
age
30-35,
*phone47
writes:Hi all :)I have a friend who ive known for a good 5 years, although last 3 years we only meet every few months due to university. I went out with with her and few friends on a night out. When we got back home from the night out, i went into her room and we started making out etc and I ended up staying in her room, i didnt sleep with her (when i was supposed to be sleeping in the other room) I was so drunk.Woke up next day, she wanted a hug as she woke up, so it was all fine and to my horror I didnt remember half the things she was telling me about the night out, she seemed to remember it all!That day I had to leave, there were alot of other friends around so we got busy in the group and the day went of, I left the same day without saying much to her apart from the normal.Few days later I get a text from her saying ":( U promised to take me out on a date when u were drunk, i dont expect u to remember, its okay'??????? What do i say to that?!anyway i said sorry i dont remember much of the night, but who cares, i'll still take u out'no reply.next morning she txt smiling face from her which was weird.She than rang me out of the blue yesterday evening 'Is that you, i just saw u!' i replied no that is not me, im at home' than she told me about this guy she was with and she thought she saw me.So she basically rang to tell me shes with another guy? (what u think)4 hours later that night i get a text saying "i read ur text so many times and it makes me smile"she is referring to the one i said i cant remember but i will still take u.I dont have any female friends handy to interpret this girl, so can you lot shine some light on this please.Thank you
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (29 December 2011):
 she may not mean anything by it but ya know what... you can ASK HER... what's the story with this other guy
sounds to me like she likes you as more than a mate however
A
male
reader, iphone47 +, writes (29 December 2011):
iphone47 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for all the responses. They have all helped.
To be honest I agree I should think of place, give her ring and ask her, I already know she will say yes but what annoys me is the fact that I've replied to her texts or called and she's somehow always finds a reason to tell me she's with this 'other' guy. So what is the point in making effort to tell me about him. If she likes him she can go for him, I just hate making effort if I know she was with another 'potential' guy. If that makes sense? Does it?
As for me, I've not got a problem with organising something interesting, there's no pressure whatsoever. It's her behaviour and weird signs that put me off and stop me from calling her right now. I don't want to go chasing her whilst she is enjoying the chase by 2 guys whilst she has a good laugh over it with her mates....some of which are also mine.
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A
male
reader, LovelessAct1 +, writes (29 December 2011):
Its not that all confusing: she wants you to take her out on a date, and is waiting for you to do so. If you think you like her as more than a friend, go ahead and do it! She's clearly dropping hints that she's waiting.
The only really confusing thing was the part about her out with this other guy. To me it means one of two things; either this guy is just a friend she was hanging out with and nothing more, or she's just trying to get you a little jealous so that you'll make your move.
Conclusion: Ask her out (if you think you're into her)
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A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (29 December 2011):
 If you have any player friends, they're usually the best possible source for interpreting girls, for future reference.
Anyway, she's either putting herself out there and giving you an opportunity to upgrade from friend to friend with benefits, or possibly to boyfriend; or, she's setting you up to see how far you'll go over this for her own amusement. Since you've been friends for so long, the latter seems unlikely.
As for this girl now, if you want to date her, here's what to do: figure out where you want to take her, then call her and tell her (don't ask, tell) where you're going, and what time. Pick someplace low-pressure, but within walking distance of a more high-energy place. A quiet pub where you can talk would be a great bet, especially if it's within walking distance of a louder pub - or, for that matter, a minigolf or go-cart place. Anywhere loud. Go to the quiet place, see how things progress, and if it's going well, transfer to the loud place. If things are in a "just friends" vibe, enjoy the friendly atmosphere, maybe go meet up with some friends afterwards.
Be sure to tease her about the whole thing, make her buy the second round, and generally remain relaxed and confident. You already know her well enough that you don't have to go through the awkward first-date "trying to impress her" routine, and can just enjoy the night like she was your friend but with more teasing. Don't be afraid to get physical (touching her hair, arm, lower back - with confidence, not hesitation) or to make a move if it's open. Nothing kills a girl's attraction faster than hesitation.
If you don't want to date her, do the same thing and just tone down on the flirting. Maybe go to a movie - those are terrible dates but good friend-things to do. Just take her on the date, make it clear you don't take it seriously, and move on without worrying about it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2011): Confusing! I would say she does like you as more than a mate, and, so she doesn't spoil what you have, she was/is trying to see if you do want to actually take her out,change the scenario, or if it was drink talking. If dating her is what you want, not just mates, then ask her again,properly,when sober!
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A
female
reader, Eilish +, writes (29 December 2011):
 It seems to me that this girl genuinley really likes you. :)
She rang you saying she was with another guy - she probably wasn't at all. When girls see something they like they sometimes tend to play hard to get. Therefore she probably said this to grab your attention, see your reaction, and see if it bothered you or not.
By the sounds of it, she really wants to go out with you. Making a girl smile is a very good thing. If you like this girl too, then take her out like you said. There is nothing worse than a man letting a girl down.
Also, have you noticed how she's the one always contacting you first? Thats probably because you are on her mind!
Just please don't lead this girl on. There is nothing worse. If you don't want to go out with her, tell her straight and apologize for getting her hopes up on a drunken night. If you do want to go out with her however, let her know and arrange a nice night out. But by everything your saying, yeah this girl really likes you and wants your attention.
Hope I helped :-)
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