A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I need your advice. I have a friend whos a devout christian hes always stood by his religion, jesus is everything to him, he doesnt believe in sex before marriage and is a very true guy. Well i think he is. hes always been generally quiet and a nice guy however hes in a band and when hes with his mates obviously he livens up although hes not bessie mates with any of them.Thing is hes the type of person that livens up and i suppose you could say changes to join in. hes said to people before that hes not a virgin and that hes slept with people but thats when they've been on the subject of gfs and sex. Even though he admitted he was, not to them but to me and some others.it breaks my heart to think he has :(However with that and theres someone in the band thats a total wind up and an idiot and hes been jokingly calling this guy a slag in messages and things and im really afraid its because he has been sleeping with people and gave up what he believes in. hes a true christain his whole family are but do you believe he would, after all people like his band members are saying he has but then again is it just him taking stuff to the extreme and saying he has because the rest of them are like that?
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female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (8 June 2010):
 If he has the fear of God in him ,he will not but most of us are only human and not perfect. We do commit sins everyday.
The chances of having sex before marriage is higher because of his circumstances.People can change and they can succumbed to their urges when all around them are doing it.
If you are in the devil's territory, it is very hard to fight against that urge..
A
male
reader, daletom +, writes (8 June 2010):
None of us know what your friend has or hasn't done. A few observations you might consider include:
- Even if there is no overt pressure to do so, people tend to adopt the standards of those they associate with.
- The current U.S. culture encourages sexual activity, and often stereotypes those who aren't having regular sex as inferior, or at least abnormal.
- Among teenagers in particular, many will claim to be sexually experienced even when they aren't. This may be to avoid ridicule or exclusion, though the reasons are still being studied.
- A significant number of teens who become sexually active will refrain from sex for an extended time after their first sexual relationship ends.
If your friend feels very strongly about his sexual standards, he is likely to feel ashamed and guilty if he violated them. Why do YOU feel a need to know about his behavior?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2010): Just because he is a devout christian does not mean that he is perfect, people, even devout christians make mistakes. Its possible that he has slept with someone.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2010): sometimes talk is just talk - no real truth behind it. But if not, what does it have to do with you? If he's such a devoted christian then surely his actions are between him and his God. Just be a friend to him, don't judge or jump to conclusions ... its his life, not yours. You live the way you want and he will too, and if he needs your help or guidance then i'm sure he'll find ya. Have faith and try to look for the good in folk.
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