| A
female
,
anonymous
writes: I'm 21 and in a 6 month relationship with my partner who is 30. Last year whilst in an unsteady relationship i became pregnant with my daughter, my ex demanded an abortion and left me. Im now in what i feel is a secure and happy relationship but i have become pregnant again.I am currently 3 months, but lately things have gone wrong, the sale of our house has fallen through and I ave been offered the job of my dreams. I'm not sure whether it would be best if i had an abortion?! He has a 4 year old daughter himself, whom he worships and he is concerned that he may not be able to accept the new baby, he has trouble with my daughter. He also thinks that maybe its best I opt for the career instead. But we are both unsure. I do have insecurities about myself but thats another story.Please help I'm getting more confused.
View related questions:
abortion, my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 June 2006): Hi It seems you kept the child from your first pregnancy, If this B/F has a problem with your child & not his own, you need to kick him to the curb before your child starts to suffer for it. As far as Abortion goes, as others stated, only you can make that choice, BUT, I had one when I was 26 & shouldve known better. I thought I wasnt ready, the father was not in the picture, etc... EXCUSES. There are consequenses to our choices, & I have regretted my decision for 4 years now, & always will. I have cried & suffered with tremendous guilt & severe Panic Attacks. Been doped up on medication for depression, etc.... Please excuse my bluntness, but I feel its never worth it.Please think VERY carefully before you make such a huge Decision. There is support out there & other options. Good Luck
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2006): Chicken!!! Stop!!! I have a belief that ALL a baby needs is a mummy who loves it. If you can't love your baby enough, then don't do it. But if you can, then go for it babe. Just go for it, you will find a way with or without the dad. This is your baby, don't give up on it because of transient problems. Things will be alright in the end and you can be a strong and empowered woman and look after all your children, money or no money, man or no man. Good luck, and please, do what really feels right to you. This is your life honey, be strong. And don't forget, a baby can soften even the hardest heart xxx
Oh and one more thing, a bloke that can't accept your little girl needs kicking into touch. I really mean it, you need to put your bloody foot down there chick. Your children are more important than ANY man xx
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2006): No one here can give you the go-ahead on that type of decision..this is a serious life issue, we are discussing here. You list a whole bunch of negatives about why you shouldn't have this baby. It appears you have a bf who doesn't want to become another father and he's convincing you to not go through with the pregnancy. Look deep into your heart and make a decision here, based on what this baby will need. I think it 's time for you to make plans for this baby. This child needs and deserves to be loved and cherished. If you are finding the decision to have the baby or an abortion , a difficult one-I might recommend you consider something else. Give the baby two loving parents and a chance for a good future. Place it up for adoption. Many agencies will care for you and the baby and make sure it has a good home. Many agencies will help you during your pregnancy, and with finding your baby a good home, and give you counseling. This is a good option, if you feel another baby will be a hardship and especially if you are considering the idea of an abortion. But the final decision rests with you and your bf. You are facing some important issues. Good luck
...............................
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (5 June 2006):
 Whoa...you say he has trouble with your daughter, how can someone have trouble with an infant/toddler? This does not bode very well for bringing yet another child into the picture. And he thinks he may not be able to accept his own new baby as well. You had better make sure that you can raise two children on your own because he may decide to walk out on you after you have the baby. Raising children is difficult enough with two loving parents but it can be sheer hell if you have a parent that doesn't want to be one. You will have to do some real soul searching on this one and make the best decision for your daughter. Good luck.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2006): hi you seem like a good person to me not getting rid of your first child. you must of wanted to have children they are a real dream but hard to look after i was 13 when i had my first child and i have 3 now but i love them to bits. this is not a decision that we can make for you. you need to sit down with your partener and discuss what you think is best. maybe ask his daughter if she would like anothe baby in the house and bring her in to it hope i help hun good luck. all the best x
...............................
|
