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Worried that I'm not big enough

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (14 May 2017) 5 Answers - (Newest, 16 May 2017)
A male United Kingdom age 26-29, anonymous writes:

My girlfriend told me that she is feeling my inside but only a little and she is probably sure that she cant cum from this. I can make her cum few time in 2-4 minutes with my fingers but she can't feel my penis right.

I'm average guy. Lenght above 6 inches and a little thin 4,8-4,9 inches. I know she had one much bigger partner that was around 8x6(dont ask me how i know, it is killing me but I'm more concerned about her happiness that my ego) but it was not long episode max 3 months and it was 3 years ago.

I love her, I'm planning to move with her in few months and I'm really happy with her. I'm the first guy who made her cum from fingers and intercourse but we having sex for 6 months and she cum only once from intercourse. We are young(20years old) but I think that if she would find a partner with bigger penis that she could feel right, her bed life would be much better. Im woried.

She is telling me that even if she would never came again from intercourse she is happy with our sex life and it is the best she ever had - but she admit that with this bigger guy she never had a problem with feeling him and the intercourse felt different(so basicly mean better). I'm scared because in my mind I keep thinking that I will never give her true orgasm and she would be better with someone else. Also I trust her but in my mind I keep thinking that she will cheat on me someday because she can't get an orgasm with me. What should I do?

I'm doing what I can but... I'm asking what she want in bed, our finger/oral/interouse sessions are at least 2 hours long, I went from 5 min intercourse to 30min by doing kegels - but what is the point of controlling my orgasm and erection if she is not going to cum from it because she can't feel it? I even start jelqing, streching and kegels but I don't think these exercises works and I'm stuck with 4,8 inches girth and girlfriend that can't feel me. Please, help.

View related questions: erection, my penis, orgasm, sex life

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (16 May 2017):

aunt honesty agony auntMost women don't achieve orgasm through intercourse, she seems happy with the attention you are showing her, you need to remember that even though for most men its about the intercourse for most women its not. Its about stimulation. You sound like you have it worked out. Don't worry about her past, believe her when she tells you that your sex life is the best. If you want to try new things then buy some toys.

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (15 May 2017):

CindyCares agony aunt No, you are not a little thin.

Average penis girth as resulting from a study carried on by King's College ( London ) foundation on a sample of 15.200 participants ( .. so, a relevant sample ) is 4,58 inches. You are slightly above average.

What do you care anyway ? She is happy with your sex life, which is the best she ever had. End of story, then. If you trust her, and you haven't ever caught her in telling you lies, or misrepresenting truth for personal gain, or deceiving you / betraying you in any ways so far- why shouldn't she be absolutely honest and reliable when she expresses her satisfaction ?

Take her word for good, and show her the courtesy of not considering her an idiot, and of accepting that she knows what works for her in bed. If she says that 4,8 girth is fine, then is fine.

Plus, what girth has specifically got to do with it? You make her orgasm, most of the times. An orgasm is an orgasm, whether reached by using hands or tongue or penis or a vibrator etc.

Are you worried because she can't ALWAUS come from intercourse ? ( same as the majority of women can't)Are you buying into the myth that the only orgasm that

" counts ", the only " real " one is the one that happens through intercourse ? ...

My answer can only be : yeah, right.

This is an idea that had began being outdated when Freud, who had come up with it, was still alive; and his contemporaries and collegues in the field of psychiatric research , sort of snickered, rolled their eyes and went like : " You know Sigmund... Nice guy and all, , but- set in his ways ". And Freud has been dead for 80 years...

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A male reader, N91 United Kingdom +, writes (15 May 2017):

N91 agony auntIf she is telling you that this is the best sex of her life, believe her.

You said you have a good relationship. Don't sabotage it by having these thoughts.

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A female reader, chigirl Norway +, writes (15 May 2017):

chigirl agony auntTruth: women reach orgasm from clitoral stimulation. Only about 10% or so frequently reach orgasm through intercourse. Penis size is irrelevant to this. This is about female anatomy. The clitoris is the equivalent of the penis. Her reaching orgasm through intercourse is about as likely as you reaching orgasm through anal sex (yes, that means a finger up your butt and no touching the penis).

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A male reader, Faint Dominican Republic +, writes (15 May 2017):

I think u can actually try to by a dildo with her dieal size, or any sex toys to replace the feeling she cant have from ur genital, i do that to my ex and she loved it , u might think that she still need something else to get intense orgasm but no one is perfect, it doesnt matter if its ur penis or a sed toy, as long as she experienxe that intense orgasm wih u, thats what matter

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