A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Dear Cupid,I am at a cross roads in my relationship and I need some advice. I have been in a secret work relationship for a few months now. The relationship started off as not being very serious, we both agreed that we would hangout and talk but keep it causal. We work together, same kind of role but different teams so I see him at work a few times a week. We keep everything to ourselves, the relationship has stayed a secret. The problem is now that we have been dating for a few months I have started to have stronger feeling for him. We are the same age and maybe I am just ready for a real relationship and he is not. I told him how I feel and that I have grown to care for him much more but he doesn't seem to want to change how things are going. He doesn't share his feelings very much, he never has so it is hard for me to tell if he really wants more or not. We talk all the time we are really close but he is not giving me anything to say he's ready for anything more...We live pretty close to each other and we see each other outside of work a couple times a week but I would like to see him more, again I have told him but I really don't see much of a change. As far as the work part goes up until now I haven't really cared that this is a secret but if we are going to the next step I don't want to hide this anymore. I have four or five close friends that I work with and keeping this secret life from them is really hard especially now that my feelings are involved.I am stuck on what to do. Take the few months of time and now feelings that I have invested into this relationship and put it all behind me or wait it out and see what happens??!? I know he cares because he has told me but if I don't know how much and he isn't giving me much in return, I guess there really isn't much I can do. As I am writing this out I think I am starting to realize that maybe this is a one-sided relationship but how do I really know??Thanking you in advance,- Miss Too Confused!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHe wants to keep it quiet because of all the work talk that is always going on. We work in a big office and rumours and gossip is always flying.
I'm at the point that I really don't care anymore because I trust him, he sees it as adding more stress.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2008): Hi there
Are there any reasons that he may want to keep this quiet?
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