A
female
age
36-40,
*iffy116
writes:OK so two days ago my boyfriend broke up with me. He is 2 years younger than me (I'm currently 22 he's turning 21 this December) and we met at school. We have been friends for over two years and one night when he came to visit me something between us just clicked, this undeniable attraction. We were together for 3 months. Keep in mind that for 2 of those months I was working on a cruise ship but we were able to maintain contact relatively well. Over this period of time we discovered that we truly loved each other and were in love with one another. I had to come back from the ship because I got sick and was able to see him and spend decent amounts of time with him since then.I never knew anything was going wrong between us, until he started talking to me one night. He explained to me that he loves me more than he has ever loved anyone before and that I'm the first person who he has ever been in love with, but can't be with me right now. He wants to but needed to end things. He had been trying to articulate those thoughts for a month and 1/2 by that point and asked his friends what to do. He told me that he needed to end it now so that we could still be good with one another opposed to staying together and eventually pushing me away and then finding any excuse to break up and making any kind of relationship unsalvagable. He continued to say that with all of his life's stresses with school (currently not going and needs to go back) and work (he just got laid off 4 days ago) he needs to get his life in order and can't deal with the normal stresses of a relationship. He says he wants to be with me, but also wants to treat me the way I deserve to be. Up until that point I guess you can say that I was a quazi-sugar mama which I guess made him feel weird since he wanted to be spoiling me. He wants to become a stronger bigger man, someone who he is proud of and someone who is able to treat me right. He said that whenever he is around me he wants to better himself , and that he needs to grow up and get his life in order so that we can be. Lastly, he said he was willing to take the risk that when he is ready I can't forgive him or I can but don't want to be with him/found someone else. Even when we got together it was bad timing, so I understand where he is coming from. We are both going through big transitions in our lives right now, it's just hard loving someone so completely and not being able to show my true feelings and visa versa. I also appreciated how he dealt with this situation because it did show how much he cares for me, but I told him I'm willing to wait as long as my heart lets me... That's the gist of my situation, what do you think is going on?ps- yesterday he went with me to my Dr.'s appointment and for me to get all my testing done, drove him back to his house and got sick; he and his dad took care of me. I kept on saying thanks and I'm sorry but he said he was happy that he could actually take care of me...
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broke up, get back together, period Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2008): He sure sounds very caring.
"There isn't any formula or method. You learn to love by loving". (quote by Aldous Huxley)
Remember the words of Marie Curie: " Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood".
Be patient, best wishes.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2008): This guy really cares for you, and wants the best for you! I know how it is too love someone so deeply and be unable to be with the person! Totally different situation...LDR...but the feelings are similiar.
Your question was Will you get back together? I hope so, he sounds like a mature, responsible guy.
All you can do is keep your promise...wait as long as your heart lets you!
I hope it eventually works out for you both!!!
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A
female
reader, Miss Potter  +, writes (22 November 2008):
 When someone really loves another person, they would do a lot to be with that other person. It takes a while to really love someone, on the other hand to fall in love is easy and can happen overnight. Maybe he will realise that he doesn't want to lose you and you will get back together, and if he doesn't then maybe he didn't want you that badly in the first place.
You are right about one thing - wait for him as long as your heart tells you its ok, but if you end up meeting someone who you are interested in and they are interested in you I think you shoudnt hesitate to start dating again.
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