A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:In my first year of uni, i had a really close friendship with a friend (obviously). anyway, 2 and a half years later, we are barely on speaking terms, but due to convenience we have to live together in rented house, just by uni with 2 other frieds. the thing i need help with is understanding, what the hell went wrong...and if we will ever be friends again. First of all, i dont even know what i really did that was so wrong, that she not only cut me off, but has managed to alienate me from 2 other friends as well. We were very close, and then for the first time in my life, i got a boyfriend (it took ages..but i got there). and i admit, perhaps i was spending too much time with him. BUT he wasnt at uni with us, he would only really come over in the weekends, when she would go back to her families house anyway. Also, when i asked the opinion of my other friends, they didn't think i was unreasonably, crazily spending my time with him. So anyway, i asked her what was wrong apparantly everything was 'fine' but i apoligised in anycase if i had been a rubbish friend. Well, things never got better, and it is so difficult dealing with aggro all the time in the house. Also, she seems intent on taking away all my friends (all of whom i introduced her to) and resorting to weird underhand ways of making me feel s*** and guilty. I have apoligised umpteen times. it makes me question the friendship we had in the first place, was she nice or an award winning actress. surely, if i've apoligised, that should be something right?I understand that we will probably never be friends like we used to, but i cant take the cold war anymore either. I dont know if she is passive, or gutless, but no matter how many times i have asked (apologised) she will not tell me what the hell i did, or how i can fix this. I havent helped matters, recently i've also dished out some aggro, but i've bit my tongue for so long, i cant take it. its a bloody nightmare that is ruining uni for me.So can any1 give me any ideas, on what happened, and how i may bring a resolution to this. Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, ChiRaven  +, writes (6 April 2007):
 Put up with it until the end of the term (or until you can get out of your present living arrangement) and then move out.
People change, and friends don't always stay friends forever. Sometimes people get on one another's nerves for reasons that really make no sense to anyone else. When that happens the best thing you can do is get yourself out of the situation as gently as you can. The uni years are times of great stress in a person's life anyway. Don't expect 100% understandable behavior from everyone you see around you at this time. Remember, there are probably people who don't understand YOU, too.
|
