A
female
age
26-29,
*MLBabyDoll
writes:I feel bad for my self, I feel like i've had a horriable life....Will some one help me stay a happy 13 year old?When i was 3 i had holes in my heart so i needed open heart surgery, twice. At age 4 my dad ran me over with the expodetion, he did not mean to bcuz he didnt see me. Having to know my mommy needed surgery i was a worried 4yo, y'know things like 'why are we here!?', 'is mom going to be okay!?' ect... Age 5 my mom past away Aug 26, 2000, 8yrs later and i still cry. Come on 5yrs to know your mom thats not very long!!!! 5months later after mommys death dad met another woman, i like her she was nice played the piano and was willing to teach me, 2months later dad left her for again another woman!....married her yaaay;( (age 6) now im 13 and now that shes my mother i feel like i dont get treated equally i dont ask for much, but if i want something right then and there i dont get it, if its my 19yo step-sister wants whatever when ever she gets it! Or if im in my room and mother calls for me most of the tim she asks "will you hand me my beer?" when its on the coffee table right IN FRONT of her, that makes me mad. Even if i attept to talk to dad about it sometimes i'll get in trouble other times nothings done about it!Im not sure if you can help but thanks for your time.... -VMLBabydoll™ Reply to this Question
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female
reader, VMLBabyDoll +, writes (21 August 2008):
VMLBabyDoll is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIm now carefull with who i play online, one of my friends(sam) he feels like a theropist cuz of me, i trust him if ask him a question he'll be honest with me i've known him for 2yrs now so i completly trust him. About my counselor,im not sure what made her tell, i told her everything. Well everything as in what i posted(conselor was 5yrs ago) plus i said i wasnt happy about calling my step-mother 'mom' it didnt feel right, kinda like my mom was being replaced. Im so happy now that i've found dearcupid. I love how much help im getting from you. THANK YOU!!!!!
A
female
reader, SirenaBlusera  +, writes (19 August 2008):
 A counselor should never, ever, repeat what you tell them to anyone else, unless they have reason to believe that you're in danger, or that someone else is in danger. There are a few good ones, though. Be careful about the people that you trust online. You can always talk to the aunts here, and we will listen to you. Just be careful.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 August 2008): I guess your counselor isn't doing his/her job properly. A counselor should be there to listen to your troubles and not spread it to your parents. Ridiculous behaviour from your counselor.
Take note, don't fall for anything that is too good to be true online. Be careful, use your common sense, and make sure the people you talk to online is good and honest.
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A
female
reader, VMLBabyDoll +, writes (18 August 2008):
VMLBabyDoll is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you very much! I did have a counselor she said everything that i said would not go on to my mom n dad...she did tell! so i stoped trusting counselors because of that. Theres more to my story.......
I was 11 and played video games online alot. i was playing halo2 met a guy that didnt have a headset but would send me msgs and i shared the account with my family, my dad got on there read the msg that he sent me sayn he wanted to rape me! i didnt know any better i was 11, now im grounded from xbox live til im 14...dad trusts enough to be online again but it was my sisters idea to let me online maybe 1 month later she tells mom! so now i play online when mom and brandee is at work....
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2008): I am so sorry for what you have been through in your life;
I UNDERSTAND the hurt and the pain; all the fear and all the adjustments;
I am sorry to hear about your stepmom and the way she treats you at times; It is such a pitty you cannot talk to your dad about all this.
You really need somebody that you can confide in and trust;
You must not keep your feelings bottled up; that will make you feel miserable;
I want to share this with you; then maybe you will understand why I can relate to your situation and your feelings.
I have a 14 year old son; he too was only 5 when he had to start dealing with the emotional pain and trauma of losing a loved one; his father passed away suddenly with a stroke after a year of cancer treatment; his stepfather, suddenly passed away in a car accident;
Yeah, I know it is not easy to deal with such trauma and emotions but it is very important to TALK;
Maybe you should try and talk to your dad again.
EXPLAIN to him how you feel; tell him you don't want to cause trouble; ask your dad if he can arrange for you to see a counselor;
I send both my sons for counseling after there father passed away and also after there stepfather passed away; with counseling they will help you how to deal with the pain and how to deal with your present situation.
SPEAK to your DAD; I am sure if you ask him he will arrange it for you;
Remember you are always welcome to talk the the uncles and aunts here; we will always try and help and give advice; sometimes just sharing your feelings helps.
You are in my thought and prayers;
Best wishes, lots of hugs and SMILES.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2008): I am very sorry to hear that your mom passed away. I understand that having a step mom isn't ideal either.
Try and think positively. Do some sports, something that will keep your mind occupied. Go for a walk, get some fresh air. If you have a dog play with him/her, that will be very fun. I do that a lot with my dog, and is a really fun and stress relieving time.
As the above reply said, talk to your school's counselor. They will most likely try to help you and point you the right way.
Remember like my mom told me. Talk, don't keep things inside, when you talk it out it will help and you won't feel as bad as before.
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A
female
reader, SirenaBlusera +, writes (18 August 2008):
I am sorry about your mom. That really sucks!!
I don't know how you feel, because I'm not you, but I can understand that you want to be loved, accepted and understood. Adults aren't always perfect and it sounds like your stepmom is being unfair to you. It must be confusing because you think of her as your mother but she treats you differently from the stepsister, and you feel like something's missing. Am I right? I am happy to answer your question but I don't know if I'm of much help. I think that it would help if you had someone to talk to. Perhaps your guidance counselor at school, or a youth pastor, could talk to you or talk with your dad on your behalf. Someone who is trained about how to talk to young people, and how to listen and handle feelings.
You ask about how you can be happy. You have had a lot of horrible experiences but that doesn't mean that nothing can bring you joy. Do you still want to learn to play the piano for example? Singing? Do you play a sport? Or volunteer with animals?
I think that it would really help you to have someone to talk to, because you are obviously feeling very sad. Talking doesn't mean that you will never be sad again but it helps you learn how to be happy and deal with feelings.
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