A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:About two months ago i broke up with my long distance boyfriend of two years, i have been fine up until the last few weeks ive just been in so much emotional pain, i cant stop crying and i feel sick all the time. I cant remember why i ended it and keep doubting my decision.were both now seeing other people, although i am very happy with my new partener, i just feel i wont ever get that comfortable,or be in love as much as i was with my first boyfriend.We've tried cutting contact with each other for a few months and movingon, but i just cant seem to let go and get into my new relationship.i recently called him to ask if we could meet up and talk, im wondering if it will make things worse, or give me some closure and remind me of why i ended it.is this a good idea?im just after some advice / wise words
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2010): My main question: why in the world are you "seeing someone else" if you're obviously still very hung up on your ex? That's wrong in every sense of the world. No person deserves to be dating somebody that is secretly still having feelings for a former lover. First things first, drop the new guy. You shouldn't be dating until you're ready to. Second, meet up with your ex if need be. It sounds like you have issues that aren't resolved. Bottom line, don't move forward until your ready to. You're obviously not to that point yet.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (23 June 2010):
You'll never get any closure. No one ever does, really. There is always another question that you'll have. This isn't a good idea, and though I respect Big Ron's point of view, the truth is he doesn't need to give you closure. He doesn't need to give you anything. Insensitive or not, you're no longer part of his life. You need to accept that and you need to work through this by yourself.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2010): No I don't think it is a good idea to meet up, you have got through the first two months of being apart, seeing him again is going to make it fresh. The fact is you ended it and you must of had a reason. If there are things you want to say to him, sit down and write him a letter and let iti all out, them burn it, and let it go.
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