A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:im 19 years old, hav been with my boyfriend for 4 years, about two years ago he told me that he wanted to have a baby with me, i love kids so i said yes, i have a problem with my period i get it every 3 to 4 months apart, so it was hard for me to get pregnet. we tryed for a wile and i just as i was about to giv up i found out i was pregnet. i was soo happy and my boyfriend was to, its only been a week since ive told him the news and now he changed his whole mind about having the baby and told me to get an abortion. after soo long of trying i dont want to giv it up and i told him that im going to keep it he just said that im acting funny and that i hav to get an abortion ... im scared that he will leave me if i keep it .. but i want it really bad. i need advice on what to do. can any1 help or just tell me how u feel about this. tnx
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2010): I m happy for you. I think you made a good decision. It will be hard from the start but if your boyfriend will be supportive you ll make it through. Good luck in life :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanx guys 4 all your help but im going to get an abortion it for the best ...i can finish collage get a good job then ill try again to have kids ... my boyfriend and i are still together .. and i will be sad wen i get it done but its all for the best ... i can start my life now i wont ever make this mistake again
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2010): Have the baby you dnt need him you can get help from others. I had an abortion and I regret it soo much. You won't be the first or the last to be a single parent. Other guys would want you even if you have a baby. Go ahead and have it you will regret it. I had to learn it the hard way
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni talked to him about it 2day he dosent tell me how he feels .. if hes scared or if hes not ready or if he just doesnt want it ... he told me that hes going to think about it some more .. im not gunna stress him about it im going to just giv him time..well what ever happens ill keep you posted
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2010): see that seemed strage because then he shouldn't want abortion. Talk about it with him why did he wanted a baby then and now don't. If you give me more info i ll gladly give you more and accurate advise.I was just asuming how he felt
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni understand u but he didnt want it in 5 years or more when we first spoke about it 2 years ago when i was 17 he wanted it then, and hav been trying till i got pregnet ..and now that i am he changed his whole mind i dont think in my situation the age matters .... well thanx 4 ur comment
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2010): Look he wants a baby but not when u re both 19 because that age is really early to have a baby. It's life changing decision. That's why he acts strange because he was thinking it ll happen maybe like 5or more years later.
Me and my wife were in the same situation as u are. She had abortion we both went to collage stared our lifes and now we have 5 kids.
We talked about it a lot before she did it and after it.
Now we have five kids and happy life with no worries.
And answer to you re question is very hard to make because i don't know the guy at all. From what it seems he won't leave you but he won't be happy.
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reader, DrPsych  +, writes (8 May 2010):
 If you want the baby then it is entirely your choice to go ahead with the pregnancy. Your boyfriend may leave you when you don't have an abortion but then would you really want him in the circumstances? He says lets make a baby, you made a baby and then he changes his mind...he sounds rather controlling and immature to be honest. Parenthood will be a dramatic change to your life but if your periods are irregular and you have fertility problems this may be one of few opportunities in your lifetime to be a mum. If you have an abortion then he may leave anyway and you may go on to regret the decision in the future. I would say decide if you want to be a parent or not, and think about your relationship with your partner as a secondary issue. He may not be around to parent the child in future years anyway, or perhaps he is reacting in shock to the news and needs time to adjust. I think it is unfair of him to ask you to get an abortion but it is your body and you must decide what to do for the best. I think you will keep the baby personally and if your boyfriend leaves, it just means that the relationship had no future anyway.
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