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Why would my boyfriend mute me while talking to me on a whatsapp call?

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Question - (2 May 2021) 7 Answers - (Newest, 7 May 2021)
A female age 41-50, anonymous writes:

Hello everybody.

My boyfriend is coming back to Canada after being overseas working. He called me from the airport as he is on his way home today. We had a nice, long chat. And all was great. Except when he put me on MUTE during the call. I was on mute for a few minutes. We were using Whatsapp and the app tells you point blank "Robert MUTED the call." Why would he do that? I asked him and he said he did it by accident. But it would be pretty hard to accidentally mute a call on Whatsapp. What did he not want me to hear? I don't know what to think??????

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2021):

Maybe by accident he pushes the mute button???It is possible.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 May 2021):

No one on the internet will know why he muted you . You’ll have to do some further digging if you think he’s cheated which you obviously suspect he did

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A reader, anonymous, writes (4 May 2021):

You can ask as many people as you like, and all the aunts and uncles can do is guess. If we miss the mark, and suggest the wrong reasons, he's going to catch hell for something that may not even be remotely close to the reason behind it.

I think all you can do is take his word for it. It may be as simple as he said. If he has recently purchased a new phone; or he was simply exhausted from his trip, he just may be telling the truth.

Why are you making such a huge deal out this? Unless the guy has a history of being a sneak or a scoundrel. If that's the case, why is he still your boyfriend?

If you missed him while he was gone, what a great welcome home!!!

Now he may have a good reason to mute you!

Unless you have past evidence this guy is prone to bad-behavior...let it slide!

You have no proof he did it on purpose. Wild guesses and jumping to the wrong conclusion might just end your relationship. He's been away, and coming home to this might make being away from you a lot easier from now on. Maybe even permanent!

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (3 May 2021):

Honeypie agony auntCould it also be that he is in a crowded area and is talking to someone (like staff) and don't want to make an ass of himself (in your earshot)?

What I don't get is why he can't just say, hey I'm gonna run for a while talk to you later.

To me, that just makes more sense. If he is busy with whatever - it can be stuffing a suitcase in a trunk or looking for his wallet, ordering a latte (whatever) - it would just make more sense to let you know that he will talk to you later.

I don't think jumping to the conclusion that he is cheating would be MY first choice.

As for cell phone, I have WITHOUT wanting to do it, apparently blocked my husband's number while fumbling around my purse. Not sure how that worked or happened but it did. I have taken screenshots without paying attention and wonder why I had so many photos on my phone. SO while I'm not the most tech-savvy - I'm also not a total idiot but stuff happens.

I mean WHY would he be TALKING to you if he is with another woman? Wouldn't it just be easier to turn his phone off? Or not answer your messages?

I think you are jumping to conclusions that aren't entirely fair.

Can you explain why CHEATING is the first that comes to mind?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2021):

It is the OP. Thank you for the responses so far.

To answer your question about if he has done it before? The answer is yes.

He was talking to me on Whatsapp at a small cafe in Amsterdam last week. He suddenly went mute. For about 3-4 minutes. He said he lost the wifi connection. But again, technology is precise and it said without a doubt that "Robert muted the call." Even then. So, it was not an issue with wifi as he said.

He even cut out of many of our texting chats temporarily several times, blaming the wifi connection or internet or connectivity issues. He was there 4 months. Long enough to find someone else.

So, I am not sure why he would want to come home to be with me if he has replaced me? He could have stayed there. He is not bound to me by marriage.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (3 May 2021):

Honeypie agony auntI can see why this upset you. But I can also see this as being a mistake. Even if it's not easy to mute someone on WhatsApp (I wouldn't know I don't use that app, so I'll take your word for it).

If he hasn't done it before, I'd let this one go. If it keeps happening when he is away from you, I'd bring it up.

He was at the airport you say when this happened? So a lot of things going on for him, I can easily see it being a mistake. If he REALLY wanted to "hide" something he could have hung up - and used the "bad service" excuse or "battery died".

Does he have a history of doing skeevy things?

If not, cut the man some slack.

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom + , writes (3 May 2021):

kenny agony auntI think that you are going to have to give him the benefit of the doubt here, as he could very well of done this by accident.

You seem convinced that he muted you on purpose. Has he ever done this before?. Has he given you a reason to distrust him in the past?.

If he has not i would say he muted it by accident. He was at the airport, and airports busy places with lots going on, he could well of been chatting to you, and also busy looking at flight times, timetables, and all the other things that you do when you are at the airport.

If he has never given you a reason to distrust him in the past then i would be inclined to believe him when he said he did it by accident.

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