A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Last time I was at my boyfriend's house, I checked the drawer near his bed where he keeps his condoms and noticed that he had two types there, two of the kind he always uses with me and one other different brand that we don't use, that looked old and kinda wrinkled. I paid it no mind, however, last night, my nosiness got the best of me and I checked the drawer again. Both of the condoms he uses with me were gone and he had 2 extra of the other kind that he has NEVER used with me, plus that same old wrinkled one of the same brand that was still there. If you count how many times we had sex since I first looked in his drawer, he should still have one left of the kind we use and no others. I want to confront him, but I don't want to over-react. My suspions are that is he using the other condoms with some secret male lover or something and that he is gay/bisexual. Why else would be be buying anothe brand of condom that he never uses with me? I though most men were pretty faithful to their favorite brand anyway. We have a great sex life and he is an awesome boyfriend. I just don't know what to think or do.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionA reader, anonymous: You are very right and I don't take your responce as being condecending at all. I need to trust him. After reading what I posted, I realized that I was totally over-reacting. It's not like I found love letters or something. I have decided to stop snooping. I have been cheated on in the past and sometimes get very paranoid. But for once, I am with a great guy and I don't want to ruin it with my drama filled delusions. Thanks again for the advice.
A
male
reader, rocknroll +, writes (7 June 2009):
I'm sure he was nervous because he felt you were either implying or getting ready to accuse him of something.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for everyone's advice. I guess I forgot to mention the fact that the off-brand condoms are not his size. That is what caused my suspicion, not the fact that they were not his normal brand. He is rather well endowed and I know the brand he bought would not fit him.
Anyway, I did ask him about it, and he stated that those were old and that he had bought them way before he and I got together. He says he just never threw them away. He seemed really nervous when he answered my question.. kept moving his eyes from side to side. But anyway.. I will just leave it alone. I have no other reason to suspect he might be cheating so if there is anything else I need to know, it will come out eventually.
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A
male
reader, rocknroll +, writes (6 June 2009):
If you have something on his mind, good communication between you requires you to ask him. Be gentle and don't be defensive.
It is quite possible he is playing alone, experiementing, and the condoms is just a part of this experiementation for cleanliness afterwards.
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