A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: college started for 3 wks, I haven't seen my crush for the whole summer and since schools started he's been showing more attention to me. He would stare at me try to keep eye contact and I felt him trying to be around me. When we are in the same room and he's sitting kinda across the room his body is always faced towards me and looks over like he has something to say. When we bump into each other somewhere in the school he'll intentionally walk around by me so that I notice him. Now what I don't understand is why he is avoiding me? Is he afraid he'll do or say something wrong to me? I'm quite confused..well i'm not totally sure if he is avoiding me, I just haven't seen him, but if I do see him he will usually stare, keep eye contact, or doing stuff to make me notice him...
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell I didn't really want to type out the whole story or it will be too long, but I guess I'll just say I did make a move like 5months ago, he seemed interested but he changed his mind, not sure what the real reason was but that was that, and now this...
A
male
reader, LazyGuy +, writes (10 October 2009):
Eheh... well he is your crush, so why don't YOU make the first move?
Is scary? Well, there is your answer.
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (10 October 2009):
Maybe he's shy and doesn't know how to approach you to get the outcome he wants. Men seriously fear rejection, much more so than women and if he's a young guy he may not have much experience. It can be very frustrating when you want someone to make a move but they don't.
I am a little old fashioned and in my day, girls didn't make the first move, but I know nowdays it's more acceptable for a girl to approach first.
If he's maintaining eye contact or trying to seek your attention, I would lay money on it that he's interested. You could try some subtle approaches when he makes a move to attract your attention. Sometimes just a smile and maintaining that eye contact right back will be enough to boost his confidence to make a move. Try not to be too flirty or show interest in other guys to make him jealous. Be friendly and open and if he talks to you, give him your full attention. Let him take the lead and never try to push anything, even if your totally feeling frustrated over things. Go for the slow burn and really perfect your approach to him. Hopefully that will draw him closer to you and you can see where it goes.
My heart flutters to think of days when I was at college and the one or two cute boys I fell for, it's a very exciting time and you should relax and enjoy it :-)
Best of luck to you
Aunty Em xxx
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