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Why wont she tell me why her parents wont allow us to marry? What should I do now?

Tagged as: Family, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (22 December 2011) 2 Answers - (Newest, 31 January 2012)
A male India age 41-50, *aid writes:

i am in a strong commited relationship with a girl from last 2years. me 28yrs and my girlfriend is 26yrs old, but she says her parents wont allow us to marry at any cost, and the only option we have is to run away from home. even she doesnt allows me to at least ask her parents once and see what they would say.. Why is she doing this and what should i do.?

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A male reader, xaid India +, writes (31 January 2012):

xaid is verified as being by the original poster of the question

xaid agony aunt@clindycares thnx fr ur undrstndng n mature answer.

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (23 December 2011):

CindyCares agony aunt It's hard to say and mine is just a guess, anyway at DC we often get posts from Indian posters having trouble in their relationships because of differences in caste/religion /social status etc. Some times, even in modern urban areas and among educated , middle -upper class families. Some traditions apparently have staying power.. Are you sure that her parents aren't going to arrange a marriage for her ? That they don't have in mind another candidate from their own background/ place of origin / social environment ? Maybe she knows that she is , or is soon going to be , spoken for, and does not feel like going openly against her parents. Maybe she comes from a very strict ,traditional family and she is not even supposed to be in a relationship until they say so !

Are there any relevant social or money differences bedtween your family/background and hers ?.. Maybe she does not want to hurt your feelings by just coming out and say " My family thinks that all people from your background or line of work or area are thrash "- she is ashamed of her parents' prejudices.

Or maybe, I have just seen too many Bollywood movies :) but frankly , since you are both adults, I don't see what else the problem could be.

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