A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:All of my boyfriend's friends live on the opposite coast, where he grew up, so I don't get to meet them often. One of his friend's came out to visit our area with his girlfriend last week. I was so excited to meet them. I had heard all about this friend and their funny antics growing up and whatnot. He also told me that his friend pretty recently started dating his girlfriend and that he had met her a couple of times over the summer when he took a trip home and that she was very nice. I have not been back home with him yet so naturally do not know the people and the events that go on back where he is from. So I was a little bewildered when all they did all night long (3 hours of dinner and drinks) was talk about people and events that they knew I had no knowledge about. What's worse is that it was his friend's girlfriend who was dominating the conversation all night and constantly steering it toward topics that only the three of them have in common (e.g. the people and events from back in their hometown). I felt like she was purposely trying to control the conversation and steer attention away from me by solely talking about things she knew I could not participate in. I also felt like she was acting like her and my boyfriend go so way back and she knows "so" much about him based on the two times they met. And I was so bored. And I did not get to know his friend at all. We left dinner and I could not tell you one thing about her or his buddy, other than that Phil, who is the son of Ted who is neighbors with Cindy, whom THEY all know, was at that party THEY all went to that one time, according to her. It was the most obnoxious dinner I have ever had to sit through. I would never do that to someone. At one point I told my boyfriend how I felt and he comforted me, said he noticed it too, told me I looked beautiful and I am doing a good job, just hang in there and be nice, play along. He didn't feel we should force it or fight it. He had his arm around me the whole night and was a sweetheart to me. He said, just let it be and smile and walk away the bigger person. And that is just what I did. Opinions: What the heck is this girl's problem? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (27 October 2014):
 She might actually also have been uncomfortable. I have a friend who turns into a VERBAL waterfall when nervous, I mean she DOESN'T shut up lol. She is better now, than she was when we were in our 20's though.
So all in all, don't assume she did it to be "mean" (one-up you) even if she did, but just don't have any expectations of her being a friend.
We have all been introduced to people we don't click with, but we can act civil around them. Her loss, honey.. :)
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2014): Thx for the input honey pie. Yeah I feel the same way. I felt that too, that she had no intention to try to make friends with me. Well, maybe they did or maybe they didn't notice it. I mean the girl was nice! At no point was she directly rude or condescending. She was talkative and engaging. The problem was she was only engaging her boyfriend and my boyfriend in the conversation. I felt like she was trying to "one up" me by letting it be known that she knows all their friends and some of their family, like she was part of a "club" that I didn't know about or belong to. Three hours of this. I think she asked me ONE question all night. When my boyfriend mentioned that his sister had come to visit our area last month, she immediately turns to me and says, with her eyes popping out of her head, "Did YOU meet her?!?" That was the only question she asked me all night long. I said, "yes. We had a lovely time." But I was so uncomfortable. I was like really? That's the only thing you care about knowing about me? Basically, all she wants to know is whether my boyfriend brings me around his family/friends like her boyfriend brings her around his? She made me feel like we were in competition, like, who is the more important girlfriend. It was so lame. I hope not all of his friends girlfriends are like this.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2014): As Honeypie said this girl was trying to assert her dominance. Another factor could be she is the type of female who is jealous of any female around her because she might steal the limelight. That type of female seems to enjoy isolating a female they view as a newcomer into a group. I have seen this behavior before at work. Very petty and juvenile.
Very kind of your boyfriend to put his arm around you to show support and treated you well. Hopefully your bf doesn't expect you two to hang out with them in the future.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (26 October 2014):
She is an attention whore, pure and simple.
It's look at ME! Listen to ME! I'm the center of the universe!
Some people are like that. Mostly because they really aren't all that interesting themselves so they pull the "memory lane" routine, that way they can (more or less) control the conversations and feel like they are the center of attention.
Honestly, I agree with your BF, to just smile and walk away. After all I bet you BOTH her BF and YOUR BF noticed her behavior. And it's NOT making YOU look bad.
She obviously isn't looking to make friends with you. Almost seems like she was trying to "assert" her dominance. Silly girl.
Some people are great to be around, some are not. I think she is in the latter category. Though.. between your BF and HER BF I'm a little surprised they "let" her get away with acting that way.
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