A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I was married for 13 years to a man 17 years older than me - we have 3 children together. Few months ago I found out that he was having affairs with multiple women and filed for divorce. Shortly after that, I met a man, in his 50-s and started dating him, contrary to any common sense. We are completely different people - different socially, financially, emotionally. After the first kiss with him, my sex drive went through the roof. Now I need sex all the time, and only with him - he, on the other hand, does not - he tells me that he is much older and that is why he is almost never in the mood. My soon-to-be ex-husband was almost his age and he was always ready to have sex, any time - day or night. So, it is very different for me to beg a man to have sex with me. And when it does happen, he just lays there - not really trying to please me. But that would be ok, I would not have minded "doing" everything if he would at least show me some signs of affection. He does not. It obviously upsets me. On top of it all, I feel SO guilty for being attracted to someone and spending my emotional energy on someone other than my children. Today he told me that he does not care if we are together or not. Why is this happening to me? I am very pretty, successful, smart - what am I doing wrong?
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male
reader, gregory6  +, writes (28 July 2010):
If you are so successful, and smart, then you should be smart enough to know that instantly hooking up with one person and expecting instant magic is a little premature. Why not stay by yourself for a while, assess the past and reflect on the future.
This older man might be feeling pressure to perform, or he might just not be interested. Maybe you have an issue with wanting someone who doesn't want you, since as you're pretty and feel you are succesful maybe you have found it easy in the past to attract attention, and now you have someone who is not that impressed, you're hooked.
It all sounds like a potential disaster. Take a step back and stop panicking. There's plenty of time.
A
female
reader, lady662 +, writes (18 July 2010):
I know how you feel. Everyone tells me i'm a very good looking woman and could do better. He never touches me anymore. Our relationship has become sexless. I feel I need that attention and love. I went and found elsewhere. That only created more problems. I fell in love with him, he is in a relationship. Now I know I need to let go. I do not know how. He gave me everything I was not getting at home. Now I have 2 men and really do not have either one. So my advice is to if you can find the strenght get out. And please do not get involved with anyone else while you are still with him. I wish you luck and if you figure out why guys can't appricate a good woman let me know.
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A
male
reader, BrownWolf  +, writes (18 July 2010):
 "I am very pretty, successful, smart - what am I doing wrong?"
Life is just bringing you back to Earth. Some people think when they have all that going for them, things should be...easy. Well, life does not play that game.
Lesson...a good relationshop is not base on, Pretty, and successful, but smart enough to know what love really is.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2010): DUMP HIM!!
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A
male
reader, yeahserious +, writes (17 July 2010):
 ARE YOU SERIOUS WOWW i cant believe there is a woman like you!! Id like 2 know how you even started seeing this old man your still so young why is it that your interested in way older men?? Younger guys dont interest you at all??
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