A
female
age
26-29,
*adieMarie
writes:I've been dating my girlfriend for over 3 years now and we're both still young..(19 and 20) too young in my opinion to lose interest in sex with one another but now it only happens like every other month or so. She lies about watching porn but her recent searches say otherwise it's literally site after site of porn and she'll do it while I'm in the shower or when she knows I'm getting him from work within the next hour. I don't understand why she can't just have sex with me especially if I'm home too! She lies about it but I know that's the only time she locks the bedroom door and like I said I've seen her recent searches online. Why does she do this?! It hurts me because yes I've watched porn but it's been when she isn't home and isn't coming home for awhile. I wouldn't watch porn if she was home and I could just have sex with her.
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (20 June 2016):
 What she does in private should be her business. I can understand why you feel hurt but you should not be checking up on her. The best thing you can do is talk to her, and ask her how she is feeling about the relationship? Explain to her you feel your sex life has went down hill and ask her has she noticed as well and if there is something you can both do to spice things up.
How is the relationship in other areas? Do you both get on well apart from sex? It could be the relationship has run its course, it could also be that she is still young and she is wanting to explore her own body, which is totally fine. It does not mean that she rathers this than being with you. You just need to talk to each other and see if you can work through your issues.
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (17 June 2016):
 But watching porn and having sex with another person are two completely different things...! Why don't people get this? It's not the same! Her pron watching has nothing at all to do with her not wanting to have sex with you. She wants to enjoy her sexuality, but prefers to do it on her own right now. Sex alone, and sex with someone else, are two different things that can not be compared.
So, on to the next question: why doesn't she want sex with you? It's not an age thing, it's not about being too young to lose interest etc etc. It's a matter of being together for several years and growing bored. Or, it's a sign that your relationship has run it's course. When a relationship comes near it's end, if you argue a lot, if you realize you are no longer a good fit, the sex is often the first thing that drops.
So, perhaps you need to take this as a sign that it's time to end it. You sound like you've taken this whole thing way too serious as well, and creating drama and snooping on her computer to check when she masturbates etc. It's not good at all. Her masturbating has nothing to do with your failing relationship.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (17 June 2016):
 You’ve been together for 3 years, which does sound significant; however, this means you chose her when you were 16 years old... and perhaps not the best judge of how to choose a lifetime partner. Yes, some people do stay with their teenage loves....however, they are on the same page with regard to intimacy and life plans and all that major stuff.
I have a website for you. Warning, it does spend a lot of time talking about adolescent male brains but I think it is pertinent for your situation.
http://yourbrainonporn.com
It may be as simple as, she’s no longer interested in sexual intimacy with you, even though she may feel very strongly for your welfare and doesn’t want to disappoint you.
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