A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Why is my husband so demanding at home but a pushover at work? He says things like "when I get home from work I want my dinner and a drink on the table" and "make sure this house is clean when I get home" we have 2 children and I'm heavily pregnant with our third yet he doesn't see that I need to slow down a bit now the birth is in four weeks. We have a special needs child and he goes through the house like a whirlwind. I'd rather care for the kids first- feed them keep them clean and entertained so they don't grow up and say "mom you never had time for us you were always cleaning" but he thinks I should spend the day making the home immaculate for his return from work. If its not to his standard he complains, never notices the effort I've made to look and dress nice for him or the fact that the kids are clean happy and well fed. He thinks I don't love our son because our son looks like him. I went into his workplace to do some shopping and one of his colleagues told me he lets the boss push him around. He does everything the boss asks and they think he should stand up for himself more. Boss says jump he says how high. He complained at me for asking him to drive me to hospital in the car but he runs errands for the boss in the car whenever he asks. (I'm working on learning to drive but the pregnancy has put that on hold) I'm trying to be as independent as I can and I had to quit work to care for our special needs child (at his request we didn't want someone else caring for our son) In all honesty his demands just make me not want to clean the house at all and when I do clean he only notices the stuff I haven't done and shouts at us all because it wasn't done.
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female
reader, MsSadie  +, writes (25 July 2013):
 He's compensating. My father was kinda the same way.
Get him to therapy so that, should the two of you start a family, your husband is less likely to be controlling and demanding of your children.
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