A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: HI, I feel very disappointed with my bf after 3 years. I take alot of effort for him to make him feel special for bday, anniversary etc. But very seldom he does things for me.Yesterday, i reminded him about our anniversary is this weekend and asked if any plans. He replied that its very difficult for him to be loving with me. We had some argument on that and he brushed it off.I have been asking him to brg me to a local concert.He bought the tic online today and asked em to pay for my tix.He is earning well. Why does he behave so insensitive towards meWhat should i do?
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female
reader, llifton +, writes (25 July 2014):
It's very difficult for him to be loving with you? What the hell does that even mean? I would be pretty offended if my partner said that to me.
Secondly, the tickets are also nonsense. He clearly doesn't know how to treat a woman (or anyone in a relationship). I, personally, couldn't date someone so standoffish and insensitive. It isn't for me. I'm very generous with my money and expect my partner to be the same. I'm also very loving and affectionate. To have someone say to me that it's hard to be loving towards me might very well be a deal breaker for me. Who says that?
It sounds as if there may be some basic incompatibility here between you two, and you have to decide if you're okay with that. I wouldn't be.
Good luck.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2014): This is difficult as not a lot of information to go to. It sounds like he has some commitment issues - he seems to want to keep things 'separate' between you - i.e. you both pay your own way etc. It could be just his values and beliefs that you should be equal. He could have been taken advantage of in the past. I would be frank and ask him if there is any reason that he doesn't like to 'treat' you. I personally like a man to offer, and usually they like to treat. But I'm not against going halfers for some things as I wouldn't want a 'free ride'. Try and weigh up if this relationship is as valuable to you both - if your committed you should be able to talk about this. Good Luck!
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