A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My man and I have been together for over 5 years and everything is perfect between us; apart from his friend who is causing friction for us! Will call him Mr. XMy man met Mr. X who is 40 yrs old nearly 2½ years ago when they started working together (and still do to this day) but for another company. Anyway, Mr. X is married - has been for over 10 years - and from time to time, all four of us would go out for dinner, etc. Anyway Mr. X had been cheating on his wife for the last year or so with a female colleague and I made it known that I do not agree with adultery and that I was not comfortable going out with his wife anymore when I was aware of the affair.About 4 months ago, he promised that he had broken off the affair and wanted to “make a go of things” with his wife. Mr. X asked me to try and make an effort with her as he wanted the four of us to start going out again. I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. Something I now regret!!!!Mr. X was lying about the affair - he carried on with it until she dumped him – and now he’s out every night after work getting drunk and chasing girls in their early 20’s – I mean 21 or 22 year old – while his wife is at home. At the end of the day, I really don’t care what Mr. X gets up to in his spare time as its his life and he can do what he wants with it. What I do object to, is trying to get us involved in his sordid life, as well as him telling me and my man that I’m too good for my man and that I can do so much better for myself and furthermore he tells my man this on a weekly basis. A friend would not do something like this!Anyway the final straw came about 3 weeks ago when the four of us went out for dinner – I agreed to one final night out – and Mr. X asked if he could talk to me. He said he fancied me and that “we should be together”; at which point he then leaned into kiss me. I pulled back immediately and told him that I was not interested in him. I explained that I was with my man and that I thought it was completely out of line that he would even attempt to come onto me at any time let alone when we were on a night out with partners. From that point on, he became really nasty towards me – he even told his wife that I came onto him on the night out – little does she know that he has been texting me to meet up, etc. The only good thing about it is that my man is completely aware of the situation; he was less than pleased with Mr. X for some time but Mr. X has somehow manipulated my man in believing that he was drunk and didn’t know what he was doing. Crap!I feel that Mr. X is completely jealous of the relationship I have with my man but I'm not sure why. He somehow manages to continuously manipulate my man into going out for a drink after cause “he’s having a tough time with his wife” or if my man and I are out for a drink he randomly turns up out of the blue and joins us (without even asking) and then sits there badgering my man into going out. When he says no, Mr. X then gets nasty. I’ve also noticed that my man gets really “snappy” with me, once he’s been anywhere near Mr. X. I just don’t know what to do about this person - Mr. X - as his constant medalling is now beginning to affect my relationship with my man.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2010): Mr X is the original bad boy. It's all there isn't it, cheating, lying, interfering. Are you sure he's not having sex with your man too?
Honour the sisterhood and tell his wife what he's been up to. Get some proof together incase she blames you or accuses you of sticking your oar in.
Get your man to stop associating with Mr X and issue an ultimatum if need be.
He sounds like a complete arse.
x
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