A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Long story short, am a virgin and one day my mom met an old time neighbour (who moved away but is living here again) who has one son. She kept bragging about how her daughter is "a princess" and then the guy said I have "a prince". Ever since he has hinted at wanting his son and I to be together but he seems to want me to make the BIG moves - ask for his number and ask him out, etc. Few times he gave me a ride and his son just happens to be around the corner every time (as if he planned this). He teases me infront the son about us getting together but his son just smiles and never initiates. I dont wanna rush in like am desperate but at the same time I think it could be cool to get to know him and maybe who knows. Its just that I dont want to rush in and he isn't into me or looking for someone you know?advice?
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2018): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYes thanks for your input @Andie'sThoughts and @WiseOwle I have abandoned this silly notion. It was flattering at most but its over now as I dont want to be the cause of a breakup.
I told his dad and he said the reason he pushed it was because he really wanted me for his son but had no idea the guy has a gf. Unbelieveable. Anyways he says we can still be friends and I agree but I am not pushing it. I will message him sometimes and let him initiate convo whenever.
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2018): If he has a girlfriend, that's the end to all of this. Ask his father and your mother to please stop pushing his son on you! Mean it when you say it!!!
The man is out of line, and your mother is too! They are making you look like some sad pathetic lonely girl who can't find her own man. They have to go out and take one from some other woman. Shameful!!!
They are plotting together to breakup his son's relationship; and that only places you in the center of a mess. His girlfriend will become your mortal enemy, and a wedge in the center of everything.
Meddling parents are the problem here. Now we know what's behind all this nonsense. Your mother and his father are up to no good! Maybe your mother doesn't know he already has a girlfriend. Better let her know!
He apparently doesn't approve of the girlfriend and he's sticking his nose in his son's business and causing trouble.
You need not follow-up on this anymore. Now you know his dad is only causing trouble and you should stay completely out of it. That includes your mother as well!
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female
reader, Andie's Thoughts  +, writes (6 November 2018):
 If the son has a girlfriend, just let him go. His dad may not know or just may not like the girlfriend, but you need to stay out of it.
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2018): This is verified as being by the original poster of the question@Aunts Turns out the son has a gf but if thats so wont the father know. Why would he still be pushing his son and I together?
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2018): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionGood morning and thanks to all for your advice. I really appreciate it. I will give it some consideration.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2018): I think you are on the right track. Don’t rush in, it is important to go slow. So many relationships fail because people rushed too much. Most people are not aware that there are seven steps to building a healthy relationship. (1) Acquaintanceship: the initial process of getting to know someone. You value the other person for being alive, not for what they can do for you, not because they are sexy, not because they drive a hot car. You accept them as they are without looking for things you would change. (2) Companionship: you find out the things you like to do together, what shared activities give you real pleasure. (3) Friendship: you begin to share who you are. If you don’t know who you are, this step can be tough. Be open and honest. (4) Intimate Friendship: you begin sharing some of the deeper parts of yourself. You share your fears, your anger, your needs. (5) Sensual Friendship: Now you explore the art of touch (not in a sexual way). You hold hands, hug, stroke the other person’s hair. (6) Sexual and spiritual lovers: this is the stage where many of us want to get to right away, but you should have some measure of love and commitment before you move to this level. (7) Life partners: you know each other well, you have a friendship and you can now decide if you want to be life partners.Start by getting acquainted, not necessarily “dates”. Perhaps your mother could invite the two of them for dinner. There you could find out what he is like and the kind of things he does, and find out if you have any common interests which could eventually lead to the two of you doing something together. Good luck.
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 October 2018): I think you should give it a try. If he seems a bit shy; then at least allow his father to introduce you both. He seems interested enough to be waiting to see you, he's not hiding! Even it is quite convenient he's always there, waiting just around the corner!
He thinks his son is a prince, and your mother seems to think highly of his father. I think an introduction and getting acquainted is in order. You don't have to make any "moves;" just be friendly and receptive, and he may become more outgoing once he has received your okay. He may be polite and not sure of how you would receive him.
Let nature take its course. There's no rush or need to force anything, if the chemistry is there. You're both adults, you'll figure it out.
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 October 2018): Speak to your mum. Tell her you'd like to spend some time with him (in public, like a café or park), without them around. Maybe her and his father will arrange it, whilst agreeing not to chaperone, if you date in public.
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 October 2018): Well the fact that his son seems to always be around the corner and smiles and doesn't seem embarrassed suggests he may also like to get you more.Why don't you tell your mum that you would be interested in getting to know him better and could it be set up that you meet and talk alone, in other words a date.Unless you can actually speak to him alone and from what you have wrote that doesn't seem possible the least embarrassing thing would be to tell your mum you would like to go on a date and see how it goes.Both families seem to think you would be a good match, both families seem to get on so what is the harm? Put the idea forward and see what comes of it, if he says yes then suggest he initiates where you will go on the date. Best of luck
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