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Why is he pulling away?

Tagged as: Age differences, Dating, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (24 November 2011) 4 Answers - (Newest, 26 November 2011)
A female Canada age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Here's the whole story..

I started dating a man one month ago that I met 10 years ago

He was my art teacher (not high school or anything) group lessons

But we had a similar circle of friends and he was only about 10 years older. So we stayed in touch through the years of course but he never asked me out

Suddenly he starts flirting and then asking me to accompany him to a party. Things went great there we had fun. The next day he said thanks for going and invited me to a show that Friday. We again had fun and all was well. We made out a bit. I told him that I'd not had sex in a year, which was true, and wasnt sure what I wanted yet, and that I wanted to wait. The next weekend

We hung out at his house and one thing led to another..

When I left I forgot my sweater (I swear to god it was an accident) I told him I needed it but if it weren't for that contact he's initiated nothing, which was a sudden change.

I know I've confused love and sex but I thought we knew each other

He brought me the sweater and was happy to see me and affectionate but didn't stay long at all. I invited him to a friends party that Sat and he said he would go but I was apprehensive-

Turns out Saturday he plays sick - shocking -

I talk to him and he says he's really sick and sorry but didnt try

To make other plans with me or seem loving not like he was the first few dates at all-

So I ask him what's going on. Why is he pulling away? That we've known each other too long to be silly about this

I say I care about him and he responds I care about you too you know that

But I don't! So I told him that it's hard to turn my feelings on and off and not seeing him or talking to him is sending mixed messages. He always would promise things we'd do together in the future etc.

He says not to get upset and then says

Just don't worry about or get upset over "this" ok?

What the heck does that mean?!?!?

I'm lost and angry and starting to hate him. We've not spoken now for three days (no texts nada) and I don't want to chase.

Please honest opinions :)

View related questions: flirt, mixed messages, text

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2011):

Thanks for comments. The sole consolation I have is that he was crap in bed. So thank the Lord I got out of that one ;)

Maybe its the players that are the worst in bed and are insecure, thats why they mess around..hahaha

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (24 November 2011):

So_Very_Confused agony aunthe got laid and he's satisfied.

when he's horny he'll be back.

your choice what to do with it.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2011):

Basically he got what he wanted. He played you Sister. That's why he is not interested but he doesn't even have the balls to say NOT INTERESTED.

Smarten up and don't ever give him sex thinking you have a guy in a committed relationship.

Smarten up and realize you are part of this situation. Why sleep with someone who hasn't committed themselves to you or you have't dated for extended time.

Because you are now behaving like he owes you his life and all it was was a sexual hook up.

Let Him go. Push it all away. Learn from it.

He doesn't care about you or he wouldn't have used you.

Sucks. But Learn and Grow and stop acting crazy and obsessive over this Idiot Loser.

Get Strong, Tough and MOVE ON.

No texts. No Calls. No NOthing. Not even friendship.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2011):

That does seem off. Guys can be slime.

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