A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: I have been married for 9 months. We are both christians and I know he fears God and so Do I. I am 35 and he is 51. I understand that things will be a little different as far as sex drive. I had issues when it started to dwindle and he did not intiate it anymore. He still tells me sometimes how pretty I am and he tells me that he loves me before leaving to go to work and when I tell him first. He started acting different even restless at times. I think he may be going through a mid-life crisis. Because he was acting strange I did approach him about my suspicions that he may be seeing someone else and he denied it and said that he feared God too much to do that and that he knew that I was the one God sent. He has done a little better since then. HE has thought some about what material things he has had in the past and concerned about the future. I encourage him all the time and tell him I love him. I know everybody has their good and bad days. I realize due to my past bad marriage that I may fear losing him to much, he his a good man. He has become more conscious of his appearance. Even yesterday when we woke up the first thing he said was I don't know what I will wear and he has made a couple of other comments like that. I know he wants to please me and do all he can and that is a concern for him due to our age difference but he says he is past that. But now I get the impression, I do trust him deep down but due to my past. You see there is this married woman at church who up until a few weeks ago would come up and hug me and be giddy but one morning we met each other at the door and she was like a deer in headlights and acted as if she did not want to hug me but I did anyways. And then I have noticed that she would leave the sanctuary and then I would notice him going back into his soundroom. She just acts weird around me. I dont think anything physcial is going on but maybe emotional is beginning. I think maybe she has said or done something and he just wants to tell me. May be I am overthinking. I appreciate any caring thoughts
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 October 2008): Thanks baby love! I talked with him a little last night due he was asking distant when I got home. He was sitting in chair and I put my arm around his neck but he did give me any return affection he just held his head down. Then i was standing at the sink and he in front of the fridge and he was looking at me and sorta lifted his eyes and I asked him what sorta jokingly and he shook his head nothing. My husband is 51 and I am 35 but age does not matter to me. It has bothered him some due he felt as though he was going to let me down. He maybe be going through male menopause to due to his weight gain, he's tired, low sex drive which bothered me at first due to I thought he just did not find me attractive. This past Sunday at church the lady I am referring to left and my husband was in the soundroom and i was sitting in front of him and she would not look over when she left. I thought I noticed him looking. He his a Godly man and he has told me before when I told him I had been suspicious not of this lady but actually I did not know who I just had the suspicious and feeling something wasnt right. I told him i thought it may be ex girlfriend. He told me no that he feared God and would not do anything. Also we went riding around and we were talking about goals and buying a house and such. He did mention that maybe somehow in his subconcious he thinks sometimes that our relationship will end like his others but then he said I know that is not true. I even asked him last night due to his past that he ever fell out of love with me that he would tell me and he said for me he would. He said if he thought that would happen he would not have married me. I think maybe this woman has said or done something to come onto him but he is just not telling me. I don't think he has done anything. But he may start wondering.I also made a comment about women being more emotional and he did say that I was the only woman he was concerned (not sure it taht was his wording) about. I rember back a few weeks ago that he mentioned that he wondered where she had been due to she had not been at church. I am so confused? Just I just keep my mouth shut since I think I may be pushing things or should I say something. Please serious replys.
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