A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Why have I had no luck in love?Is it normal for a woman who has been told she is fairly good looking with a good personality to have had such bad luck in love?For one thing - I never really started having relationships until I was in my 20s and since then I've only been involved with 3 men.The first guy was someone at Uni - who I liked at the time - but have never really been able to shake him off - as he STILL hangs around me 20 years later, hoping for a reconciliation ( which I don't want)!The second guy was a real nut case - and I mean nut case as in he is in jail for committing a horrible crime.And the third was the only man I really loved - only to find out he was just interested in me for my money and what I could buy him.So is this normal - and do other women/men have such bad luck?I did think my luck was changing last year when a gorgeous guy started showing interest in me - but then even he preferred to go after my female friend instead and left me by myself....
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (21 May 2015):
 I have to agree I don't think it's a matter of "bad luck". Could it be you are attracted to guy who "look" good (kind of like on paper) but in reality they a are not?
You talk about this gorgeous guy who ended up "running off" with a friend instead. He might have been GOOD looking but me might also not have had any substance. A good who is interested in you, will not be distracted by another female so easily.
Maybe try and evaluate the "type" of men you have gone for in the past, AND MAYBE TRY ANOTHER "TYPE" OR HAVE SOMEONE you trust try and set you up.
I think sometimes people settle for a partner that SEEMS to show interest, even IF they aren't what you are really looking for. Been there done that. So instead of waiting for Mr. Right to drop through your mail-slot go out and socialize, met new people, don't go LOOKING for Mr. Right but I think by expanding your social circle you can meet people who can be a much better fit. For instance if you join a hiking group or theater one, you will find people who are there because they ALSO like hiking/shows/whatnot which gives you some common ground right off the bat. Instead of some guy you meet at the pub or on Facebook.
A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (20 May 2015):
 Can't even make a guess on this one. Not enough info to go on. relationships are not based on luck. They involve nurturing and time. Kind of like tending to a garden.
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