A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I have been dating for over 16 months now... we've overcome a lot of stuff, and we are doing better. But through out the relationship, his brother has flirted with me on several occasions, even tried to gett me in his bed at one point. I have down flat refused him time and time again, but never said anything to my boyfriend until about 2 months ago. at first, he was shocked. But now he doesn't care... he still talks to his brother, has conversations, everything... he gets mad when I get upset. But I feel worthless... he doesn't care his brother tried to take me away from him multiple times, and still wants him in his life. The way I see it, his brother tried stabbing him in the back, and obviously has no remorse for his actions or how it would make my boyfriend feel. My boyfriend insist he cares, saying he helps out with rent. What should I do?... how can I get my boyfriend(or explain to him) to care?....
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (2 January 2013):
 His brother helps with the rent? get a new roommate!
and sadly blood is thicker than water... so he will side with brother on this...
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2013): I'll probably get hate for this , but I would give in to his brother , then tell your boyfreind what happened , saying 'You don't care about him asking me to do what i did , so you wouldn't care that i did it , would you? If you want your brother to share your girlfreind , then i'll let him. you dont care , seeing as though you did nothing when i told you'. thats just what i would do , you probably wouldn't do it though , it could cost you your relationship.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2013): Wow, agreeing with the first person on this, then disagreeing with the others. Your boyfriends brother obviously doesnt care, and im glad you havent given in on his attempts to split you guys up. if he truely loves you, your boyfriend should get a better job and move away so you guys dont have to worry bout family coming between you guys. which, by the way, can happen drasically if you dont watch it. Trust me..Also, if I found out my brother tried that at least once, I would take action against him. Period
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (2 January 2013):
 I'm assuming that these brothers are of age about 10 and 12 years old, no? ...'Cuz, from your description, they are working on sharing a toy (you!)...
You'll probably be happier when you are away from both of them....
Good luck....
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (2 January 2013):
 He thinks his rent money is more important than you. His brother is relying on him. If he kicked him out he would have nowhere else to go. His brother is jealous of your relationship so he wants to screw it up. It's sibling possessiveness, and not really sexual desire for you. Your boyfriend is hoping that you deal with this on your own. He knows what his brother is doing but as an older brother he feels responsible for taking care of him. I think his point is that if you both keep calm, ignore his brother, he will eventually get bored and give up. His brother can't take you away without your consent. Your boyfriend trusts you enough not to give in. It's an unfortunate situation they are family members. I think your boyfriend does care, but he is not good at expressing himself. He could be in denial how his brother could do such a thing at the same time hoping his brother would smarten up. If your brother groped you against your will then this is a different story. I doubt your boyfriend would just sit in silence and let it continue.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (2 January 2013):
 You are going about this ALL wrong. There is no way he would choose you over his brother, just no way. This is his flesh and blood brother. If you try to convince him to cut his brother out, he will probably break up with you eventually. If it bothers you a lot, ask your boyfriend to talk about it with him and just continue to turn him down and ignore him. Yes it's really obnoxious of his brother, but your problem is with the brother, not your boyfriend. If you try to get your boyfriend to take your side and cut his brother out, you will harm your relationship.
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