A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Why does this guy keep blocking me even after we made up? He is a guy I am very interested in and wanted to befriend with. Last year, he invited me to be his friend on facebook, which I immediately accepted. After a few months, we tried to flirt with each other, but I think he took one of my sarcarstic jokes wrong and deleted and blocked me. I was very hurt at the time, and I couldn't confront him right away because I was afraid he will say something to hurt me more. But after one month I felt I needed to talk to him, so I went to the place where he worked. He said that he was very happy to see me and I could feel that he was sincere. I didn't respond because I feel something was stuck in the back of my throat. But another one month later I went back to see him again and gave him a present and card to express my apologies for joking (although I thought he misundertood me, I apologized to show him that I want to reconcile with him). He said that it was ok and he wasn't mad at me. And he seemed fine, but he kept blocking me for the entire year even after we verbally reconciled. I never asked him why because I thought if he wanted to unclock me he would do so, the reason why he kept me blocked is because he wants me blocked. I am puzzled because I am not 100% sure if he is NOT interested in me, because of his expressing he's happy to see me and he expressed it more than once. And other times he smiled at me when he saw me, but he always seem to look away or walk away when I walk towards him and overtly pay attention to him. I am really really puzzled. By the way, all of his posts on facebook can be seen by everyone EXCEPT me. So it's not like he is hiding anything. Please share your ideas if you have similar experiences or if you KNEW what this guy's doing.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (30 December 2012):
game playing.....
even if he really is interested, he's not mature enough to behave like an adult.
stop seeking him out. IF he is truly interested in you let him do the work to get to you.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (30 December 2012):
Stop stalking him on Facebook and in real life. That is just creepy.
If he was interested don;t you think he would pursue you?
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A
female
reader, Daisy_Daisy +, writes (29 December 2012):
Hmm well it's quite possible that he did like you when he added you on Facebook, then realised that his feelings have changed. Or maybe he was just being friendly?
Facebook is a terrible way to be in touch with people - or try to get to know people - who you don't really know that well in real life; there's so much potential for misunderstanding, and what can seem a sarcastic or innocent joke to you might be really annoying or even offensive to others.
For whatever reason, he's keeping his distance. He's being somewhat polite when he sees you, but you're mistaking that for something more because it's what you want to be true.
I don't think you should visit him at work any more. Be a bit more cool if you do run into him by accident (no more "overtly paying attention" to him) - it sounds like you are making him uncomfortable. He's not keen, so it's better for you to move on and forget about him. Find someone who doesn't make you question what's going on. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Ciar +, writes (29 December 2012):
I have to agree with oldbag and AuntyEm. The man clearly doesn't have a strong desire to court you or maintain a close friendship and it more than likely has little to do with a misunderstood joke.
He could easily have asked for clarification of your comment before taking any action. And I think buying him a present was a bit much. If what you said was out of line a simple and sincere apology would have sufficed. Buying a gift comes across as a bribe.
It sounds to me as though he is happy to exchange pleasantries during a chance encounter now and then but nothing more. He may have come to realise during your flirting that you two weren't compatible.
Now about the Facebook blocking...I'm puzzled by why you would want to remain friends with someone who keeps you permanently blocked. I'm not suggesting an angry confrontation after which you part as enemies. Just quietly delete him as a friend without saying anything to anyone. You can still smile and exchange brief pleasantires when you bump into one another.
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A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (29 December 2012):
Hi
The guy has 'blocked' you on facebook and looks or walks away if you make a move toward him in public.
He is definately not interested in you its very clear, so remove him from your facebook and forget him.
The reason he was polite and friendly when you went to apologise for whatever, is because it was his workplace and he didn't want to risk any drama there.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2012): Let's not blame the OP here about misinterpreting this guy's intentions. I am sure he was flirting and leading her on, playing games. There is obviously more than just friendly talk and smiling involved here. Doubt she would be so insistent on pursuing him if he did not encourage her well beyond a just friends stage.
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (29 December 2012):
I agree with Blonde but I think you are BOTH playing stupid games. You are both adults and are acting like silly children by worrying about facebook blocking, pretending to be friends and then getting upset and ignoring eachother...You are acting the same as him, and it seems you are stalking him, so maybe thats why he has blocked you.
At 30 years old I am surprised that you think a man wants to be in a relationship with you just because he smiles at you and seems pleased to see you!!!
My postman smiles and chats with me most days but it doesn't mean he wants to be in a relationship with me!!!he is just making friendly small talk...people do that every day!!
You need to take a huge hint...this guy avoids you and has blocked you. I dont know either of you but I would bet my ass that he doesn't want to be in a relationship with you, thats why he isn't chsing after you and asking you out.
Get over it...stop fantasising and move on!!!
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