A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My husband lies about stupid little things....For example:John has a huge addiction to looking at "free" items on "Craigslist." I have no clue why, something about that site he just loves. It becomes too much when I ask him to stop so we can move on to something else like lying down or watching a movie and he persists. The other night when we went to lay down, he got up in the middle of the night, sat on the toilet with his computer for hours and guess what he was looking at the entire time...Craigslist.Some time ago we were sitting in the living room, and he was having "computer lab time" as I like to call it. I proclaimed that enough is enough and that it is time to "close our little laptops" and be married, or else I would go into the bedroom and not speak to him. He told me he'd be almost done. I went into the room, laid down, woke up about an hour later when he finally came back inside. I asked him if he'd been on Craigslist and he said no. I reviewed the history on his computer and there it was: Craigslist. He said that it was his nephew that was looking at free sofas on Craigslist. I turned to him and asked " So it was your 15 year old nephew that is interested in free sofas?" He said "yes."Now, we're looking for a house at the moment. He hates the idea of renting. We recently found the most beautiful house in the world and now, he's in love with it. So what I did was said, "Okay, if you're so confident that your nephew was looking at free items on Craigslist the whole time, I'll go ahead and ask him if that's the truth. If he says it's the truth I'll apologize. If you lied, that means I can't trust you about even the littlest things and we'll be renting an apartment instead of buying." "Fine, then," he said.He lied. Now he's upset with me like I'm the dishonest one. WHY? What in the hell can I do to help his little lying problem. It is too much sometimes. I hate having to find things out. He sometimes takes advantage of the loopholes of a question, if you know what I mean. He'll say things like "I answered the question truthfully according to the way you asked the question." I HATE THAT! He's not my little sister. I'm not an 8th Grade teacher asking a snooty teen a flippin question. He's my HUSBAND. Why must he be so dishonest??
View related questions:
move on Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2010): I can fully understand your problem. There is no difference in a small lie or a really big one they all carry the same weight. A lie is a lie and you deserve a straight answer.
It sounds like your husband just doesn't want to bother having to answer you so he just says no! He knows that you dislike the constantly being on craigslist so he's taking the cheap way out.
However, he is creating a huge mistake in his relationship because any lie creates insecurity, mistrust and eventually you will grow to disrespect him for this.
A
female
reader, boatergirl +, writes (13 November 2010):
Not sure why he can't tell the truth...but seems like the on ther response you received was from your husand, lol! It is a problem, but most likely has nothing to do with you, probably the way his parents raised him...just a thought.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2010): kindda sounds like your over analysing things.
lying about going on craigslist isnt really that big of a problem either.
if hes not lying about big things like where hes been all night or something i wouldnt really worry about it.
...............................
|
