A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and i broke up oct of last year. a little over 7 months ago i guess.He got a girlfriend right away (rebound) but then he confessed feelings for me says he wished we could get back together all while being with her. Then he saw me and says hes totally happy and "knows" he wants to be with this girl he just cheated on w/ me. then we just stop talking until just recently. Ok so now talking again on good terms (while hes still with) there wasnt much response from me at first but he kept talking about our relationship. And saying he was sorry for everything and he wants to start over but its not the rite time. This time we talked for a lot longer time. For like a week straight everyday, he said he doesnt even know where to begin to prove things to me but he wants the timing to be perfect and he doesnt think its the right time, just all this talk about how im his first love and he always compares everyone to me and to us. Then we see eachother not even for 10 minutes. Then after he texts me and says i dont think we should talk because im not trying to me shady and i cant help but act like im with you when im around you. So we just stopped talking.Well recently hes been flaunting his relationship on facebook, so i confronted him about it not really in a mean way and he says- he told me it was the wrong timing and that hes happy with his life and where it goes and doesnt want to change anything about it. And that he thinks hes being so "mature" about the whole thing. He said he had his doubts (i guess thats when he said his feelings for me) but he took the time to think about it and did what was right(its only been 4 days) and in between then he all of a sudden "knows" he wants to be with her? And wouldnt the rite thing to do and MATURE thing to do wud be to break-up w/ her even since the beginning bcuz he knows we have unfinished business? Anyway can someone tell me why he runs in cycles? Its like as soon as i start showing signs off being interested or at least somewhat he runs in the other directions and says hes totally "happy" n knows wat he wants in like only a matter of days. Most people just say he is confused, but why is it like a pattern? And why on earth does even think he wants to be with her or if he cheated on her only 2 months in, hes talking to me to saying he loves me and wants to get back together, then bam we cant talk because hes so "happy".For all purposes-why would he even talk to me if he was so happy? And talk about his girlfriend the way he did if he was so happy? And tell me things like.."well it looks like ur happier now" and "u seem to be doing great without me" He didnt handle our break-up well and it seems like he keeps using this girl as a band-aid but he keeps prolonging it." bcuz the time isnt right" And he never says its what he wants with much conviction its more "this is whats comfortable" and after he says its what he wants he keeps saying its whats best-it seems to be more like hes saying...im w/ this girl n i keep stayin w/ her bcuz its comfortable i dont have to be alone n proving things to u will take a while. He still has very very strong feelings for me and it shows, then its like he turns around and lies to himself to get through it.Can someone please help me thanks!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2010): Hello,
I don't think he even knows what he wants. He's hot and cold. He's cheated on her with you, if you get back together who's to say he won't cheat on you?
I think its better you move on. He sounds immature and he's playing games at the cost of your emotions. Not worth it.
Good luck
;D
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