A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Okay, you think I am crazy? My instinct is telling me that my boyfriend I am with for 7 month has a guy sex partner. The only proof I have is txt messages: "I really I like to see you this week"... "8 am tomorrow morning?" "K, your place or my place?" "My place..." And this goes on all the time....or it'd be after work...Gosh! You don't think two guys get together like this for Bible studies!!!! On top of that, he is not sexually attracted to me... So what this guy can do that I can't???? And I am sure he loves me but why the hell does he need him? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (4 March 2013):
 what else other than this text message exchange do you have?
you say he's not sexually attracted to you.... based on what?
and it's not a put down on you... but you ask "why the hell does he need him?"
and the answer is simplistic... because YOU are not enough for him. You are enough for other men. Or I should say for some other men... but for this man in particular, you are not enough for him.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2013): My friend used to send texts like that. She had a prescription drug problem and was trying to set up a meeting with her dealer.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2013): http://www.dearcupid.org/question/im-hot-but-he-is-not.html
You again?
That's all you have to go on? Jesus OP, there is nothing sexual in those texts. They could be smoking weed together, playing pool, working on an old car, who the hell knows?
You're obsessed with the idea of this guy being sexy with another dude but you have no proof of that at all.
Like I said in your other question, talk to him.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (4 March 2013):
 "So what this guy can do that I can't??" Have a penis.
Your boyfriend is gay and cheating on you. There is zero hope for your relationship continuing, time to end it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2013): Have you actually met the recipient of these secrets texts? If not, are you sure it's actually a man? Cheaters can be very sneaky and it's more than possible your bf has saved a girl's contact info under a guy's name to deflect suspicion.
Either way, you need to confront him about this. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (4 March 2013):
 He likes sex with a guy, and the emotional warmth of a woman. His love for you is only fragmented. I am aware that a bisexual person can be happy in a monogamous, straight relationship but this guy wants it both ways. It surely won't work for you. He is cheating on you. Actually I have to say, if he can cheat on you he doesn't love you at all. This is his problem, not yours. It is his inability to feel sexual towards a woman. So if you think it is because you are not good enough you are missing the point. What does this guy have that you don't? You don't have a dick.
It's very unfortunate that he can't find the whole package in a woman, or a man. He creates a mess and wrecks relationships because of his lack of concern for people. You can't just tell him, "Hey Mister, pick a gender."
You need to confront him not just about his secret text messages but also the lack of good quality sex in your relationship. His confused sexuality does not give him a pass to use women as "for show" girlfriends.
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