Why does it have to be over before it begins?

A female age 41-50, anonymous writes:

My friend and I after many years of liking each other have started seeing each other. The sex was always sort of brief, but now, he orgasms before we even have intercourse. And when it happens, he avoids me for a few days. What does this mean and what can I do to fix this? I really care about him.

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A female reader, Smiles  +, writes (27 March 2009):

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