A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:There's this guy who I like... I have no idea why I even like him, other than the fact he is good looking. We fooled around twice many months ago, now he's trying to talk to me again but I made it clear I don't do the friends with benefits thing. He said last time he just wanted to be friends, but still kept trying to have sex (which I didn't)..... I'm pretty sure that's what his plans are this time as well but I'm confused! He doesn't say what his intentions are, doesn't even give me a clue, just keeps saying that we should hang out again... so I'm left assuming why he wants to hang out and I kinda went off on the crazy side a while ago and said what I thought in a message to which he sent a very short reply, not even adressing one word of anything I wrote. It's driving me insane! I know he's not shy (wasn't too shy to make the move on me months ago!), so what is wrong with him that he can't tell me SOMETHING, some kind of clue into why he suddenly contacted me again 7 months later.. other than just wanting to "hang out". I think his challenging personality makes me like him more and at the same time I want to scream because he (I'm assuming) still doesn't want to date.... and I don't want this. What should I do? It's hard for me to know what to say or if I should even talk to him at all, because I don't know what's going on in that head of his, I don't know want he thinks is going to happen if we hang out... I only know what I think he thinks.
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female
reader, Blue_Angel0316 +, writes (20 November 2008):
 You are probably right in your assumption. He is most likely looking to *fool around with you again. However he has chosen to seek you out. Now this could means that he really has an attraction for you or he perhaps sees you as just an easy target@!
Don't let him get to you and by all means DON'T allow him to Fool around with you! Take charge of you own situation. If he wants a friend perhaps you are ready for that. If he really likes you he should be willing to deal with the fact that you don't do the friend with benefits thing. (Casual sex) Let him know from the beginning that if he isn't interested in the dating scene then he should just try his lines on someone else!
Stand firm on your convictions for the choice is up to you. If he doesn't see things your way then don't waste valuable time worrying over someone who probably isn't going to be worthy of you to start with.
In case he might really like you, it's up to him to prove himself. If he shows you something real then take your time and be sure that he isn't playing you. Let the fooling around wait...it won't hurt a thing and it can help you to get more out of the relationship.
God bless,
Blue_Angel
^(**)^
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