A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Hi aunts.Just a quick question. I'm in a very loving sexual relationship with my fella who I'm planning on living with later in the year.Everything is great and when we aren't together we message loads which I love. Our messages are loving but turn to our active sex life and he mentioned 'fisting' me as one he thinks we should do and that I would love. In bed yesterday he mentioned it again saying I would react like crazy to it it and I'm wondering why after nearly 2 years together he's suddenly wanting to do this and where has the idea come from?
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2016): This could be a red flag of a sort. Most likely he got the idea from porn. How do you feel about that? You need to figure out whether the two of you are one the same page and whether he is going to want to push you to do things outside your comfort zone or moral zone. He should respect you. But he could have gotten if from a non porn sex advice site or book and found out that real women in real life enjoy these things. He could sincerely expect that this would be exciting for you.But I have to disagree with some of these answers on the technical details. No, fisting doesn't permanently stretch you out and make you too loose for "Mr. Right" later. And it can be a very intimate experience, not painful, if done right. And painkillers are NOT recommended, you need to be aware of every sensation and signal from your body. And his hand could be too big and it just won't work.Porn does not reflect real life. There is advice on the internet and Amazon sells a book "A Hand in the Bush".My wife and I enjoy it once in a while. There is nothing like feeling the vagina from the inside. But it requires patience and communication. Just fingers is less of a challenge, we did 4 easily long before we considered fisting.Is he considerate during lovemaking? You might find out you like it more than you thought you would but I am a little biased. But be careful and be sure to get good advice including safety tips if you change your mind and decide to try it.This is something that we enjoy in a longtime monogamous relationship and I wanted to offer a fisting positive perspective and counter some myths put forth here. But it's your call. It's not for everyone.
A
female
reader, boo22 +, writes (27 April 2016):
 Who's getting fisted in his fantasy, you or him?
Omg....noooooo!!
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A
female
reader, Slippers +, writes (27 April 2016):
Sorry but I can't stop laughing at brown owl absolutely brilliant the ending .. and I would stick to your guns .. as don't ruin yourself and your intimate parts over a guy however much you love him ( as a rmn I advise against it)
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A
female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (27 April 2016):
 It came from porn. Either he's watching it or he's listening to someone who does (assume the former).
I second BrownWolf's response.
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male
reader, BrownWolf +, writes (27 April 2016):
Question...Is your fella's penis as big and thick as his fist??? So...if he fist you, and your vagina stretches that big to accommodate his fist, he is still going to love having sex with you when he cannot feel any pleasure???
A woman stretches wider than that for one reason and one reason only...to have a baby.
Let's assume things do not workout...and he stretched you as wide as his fist. You meet Mr. Right and you start having sex, he goes in and....what the hell?
This kind of foolishness is how some women get a bad name. By allowing stupid men to do even more stupid things to them.
You tell him... "When you can shove your own fist up your arse, I may consider your request."
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A
female
reader, Ivyblue  +, writes (27 April 2016):
 Like everyone else, I suspect porn. As for acting "crazy" for it, well I think he has glossed over the fact that these women are paid to look like they are enjoying it, furthermore doped up on all sorts of pain killers to get them through certain sexual acts. If its something you would like to try then do so with caution. Look into how he should be performing such an act in order not to hurt you or cause damage. If not and he choses to harass you about it, perhaps you could ask if he would like a fist up his arse and see if he thinks he'll be "crazy" about that.
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A
female
reader, femmenoir +, writes (27 April 2016):
 Your partner sounds quite pushy, to "assume" that you will somehow enjoy/love and react like crazy, with the act of "fisting"!
I wouldn't go there with a ten foot pole, but if you decide to, it's your perogative.
From what i've heard about it, it's quite an unpleasant experience and i wouldn't consider anybody, within a loving relationship that wants to fist you, to be loving at all.
It sounds more rough and lustful if anything.
Maybe you should give your partner a good old fist up his rear end. That should do it!!
It appears he's been watching some hard core porn and/or been chatting with somebody quite sadistic.
Remember, you only do what YOU WANT TO DO AND FEEL COMPLETELY COMFORTABLE DOING.
Anything that takes away from your comfort zone, you simply steer AWAY from and say NO to.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI am the original poster of this question.
He has always said he wants to,try new things so it doesn't get boring for me.
That's extreme though and not my thing. He knows love and romance make me melt and I don't get why he wants to do this.
I don't want some pervert in my bed just someone I love and respect.
Not asking for too much.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (27 April 2016):
 "Wow you think this would be something I would enjoy. Interesting to learn this about you. Um no, won't work for me."
Where did the idea come from? Probably porn. What does it matter?
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (27 April 2016):
 Sounds like he watched some porn to be honest. And I don't know about you, OP but it sounds... unpleasant... I'd suggest he take a fist in the rear first... see how he likes them apples.
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