A
female
age
51-59,
*isonlyme
writes:It's a bit long but i'll try and be brief. About 2 yrs ago I met a guy, he was very shy but the more I got to know him (indirectly through work) the more I liked him. Anyway he started to offer to do little jobs for me and after 8 months asked me out, so on our 1st proper date I got a little drunk and things went further than they should have, not sex, (we had no protection)but not far fom it. Anyway after this things were awkward and we didnt speak for months, apart from when I sent a hello text, he began to get chattier again and I asked if he'd mind doing me a favour, which he said yes to without knowing what it was. So we met up, he fixed the car and apart from being a little strange at first we got on fine. Since this he's been texting a couple of times a week, somnetimes just saying hello. Anyway eventually I asked him if he was busy at the weekend and he said he wasn't so I asked if he'd like to do something. He never replied for 3 days, which was very odd as even in our non speaking time he always replied within a couple of hours. Anyway after 3 days he just said 'only one more day till your hols, you lucky thing' That was it, no reference to whether or not he wanted to do something, the me asking text and the holiday thing was on the same text so I know he got it!So really why do you think he took so long to get back to me and why no mention of us doing something.Surely if he wasn't interested he'd have thought up some excuse for not doing something. So why get back to me at all?Anyway I just replied that I couldn't wait to be off on holiday, and its been left at that!I dont know what to think anymore, I go between 'he likes me' and 'no he doesn't' often. Now I'm just at a loss as to what to think!He is seriously shy but I made it easy for him I thought. What do I do now?
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2009): My b/f struck up a friendship with some chick at his office and they used to go out in the field together all the time for "work". He always played the whole thing down, and she never knew I existed. Until one day when I showed up at the company picnic and she was there. I picked up the weirdest vibes from her but my b/f denied anything was going on between them. A little while later, I told him, that I was uncomfortable about them being "alone" in the field together, he accused me of being jealous, I told him I got the distinct feeling, she was developing a crush on him and might be getting the wrong idea. My b/f has a habit of being super friendly, whch lonely,single women always mis-interpret as more. Sure enough a short while later, the whole thing blew up in his face, the chick turned pscycho and tried to poision our dog when we were on vacation. He still denies that anything ever "happened" between them, still says it was all work and nothing more, but let's face it what girl woudl poison some guy's dog if she hadn't been completely led on in some way? I have no proof, so I am trying to trust him, but I think he got in over his head, by being way too friendly, and she assumed he was interested in her and then flipped out when she realized he was quite happy with me. You should be cautious. I think this guy is playiing the same game and his weird signals is because he's invovled with someone else. Better do some dective work before you get in too deep!
A
female
reader, Sweet-thing +, writes (22 August 2009):
 He may also be seriously invovled with someone else and just hasn't said. His behavior strikes me as someone who has a girlfriend you don't know about, and perhaps he doesn't want her to know about you either. Better ask around at work and find out more about him. You might be surprised.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 August 2009): I'd suggest talking. Texting is not the way to communicate. He may be shy, or he may not be into you. Whatever the case you won't know unless you talk. No trying to interpret what a typed message means.Good luck. If you like him enough to pursue something, tell him. Maybe explaining that things went too fast before but you hope for a relationship may spark something.
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