A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend of 5 month tells me that he loves me all the times. However, he doesn't really show it. We are together at least 5-6 nights out of the week. He doesn't touch my breasts or grabs my buttocks. He caresses me and hugs me constantly, but we do not do foreplay. Even when we are about to have sex, he initiates it by caressing by back and hair. Very rarely do we ever kiss. The sex is great, however, sometimes I don't have an orgasm because I need foreplay. I have spoken to him about this several times, but things don't change. He would always kiss me hello/goodbye, and right now, I am the one who is refusing him. He cannot give me an excuse or reason as to why.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2010): You are spending too many nights together, like you are married, you have only dated 5 months. He hasn't made a serious long term commitment to you so why are you cutting yourself off from other men? He is taking you for granted and losing his interest in you. Men want women of high value that have their own lives and don't make him the main focus, stop spending so much time with him, get your own life and if he really wants to be with you, he will step it up on his own without being asked to do so. Never give a man more than he is offering you. You aren't his wife.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2010): I know how your feeling for sure. Its like the passion is gone sorta thing. I feel this way as well. It feels as though me and my boyfriend have turned more into friends with benefits. We have sex but apart from that, i dont feel like were a couple. I think the kissing and all that stuff is part of the whole romancing aspect of the relationship. If he has never been that way to kiss and all that, it may just not be a part of his personality. However if he used to and has stoped, he may have become complacent in the relationship. In other words: LAZY. He may not feel like he needs to put effort i to "seduce" you with the kissing and the foreplay cause you guys just have sex anyways. Tell him he needs to work for you more!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2010): It might be that he feels like it would be abusing you to touch you in that way. I know I've always felt that way because once I touch a girl that closely, I feel like I have to live up to these God-like expectations about the kind of treatment she receives, which are just so out of the bounds of my normal experience of life, you know? It took me a lot of time to even make a bit of progress because I just can't open up my mind that easily.So he's probably just a prude, basically.Still, people change. He might warm up to you over time.
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A
female
reader, kitty-cat=] +, writes (25 June 2010):
![kitty-cat=] agony aunt](/avatars/4e276644-588c-43d2-bf37-fe35b92660b5.png) maybe he isn't a breast man. why don't YOU try to initiate foreplay? he sounds more romantic than sexual, and you sound more sexual than romantic. i know we girls have our needs but he sounds like a nice guy. he might not know what to do. try kissing him more and grabbing his butt. girls can be dominant too, maybe he likes being on the receiving end. hope this helps :)
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