A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I'm a 15 year old girl, and I absolutely can't stand guys around my age. They are immature and annoying to me. I'm attracted to much older guys (35+) and i'm not really sure why. I don't think it's a wanting-a-father-figure thing, because though my parents are divorced, I see my dad very frequently. I just feel weird, because none of my friends seem to be this way. Is there any possible explanation as to why I like older men? Thanks.
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divorce, immature, older men Reply to this Question Share |
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female
reader, QuartzKitty +, writes (8 June 2009):
I was like you at that age. I still am, although my attraction is more to men 10-15 years older.
Some people are just wired to be attracted to certain types of people. There is nothing wrong with it. Older men are more settled, more mature. They also tend to know ho to treat a woman. Whereas younger guys tend to be only focused on their own gratification, older guys are more focused on trying to pleasure their partners as well as themselves. Older guys have a lot of advantages.
I'm not saying you should hook up with one, though. What you decide to do is your choice.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2009): Hopefully by the time we get to that advanced age we've learned a thing or two. Like how to be comfortable in our own skin, how to not sweat the little things so much. Chances are we aren't strutting and posturing any more, so we can be less concerned about putting on a show. And maybe even take the time to listen to you instead.
I'm not for a second advocating relationships with 15 year old girls. But I am saying that maybe the payoff for guys being such jerks when they're teenagers is that eventually they might grow up into someone worth being around.
Take care of yourself -- especially around men. ;)
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A
female
reader, April-xo +, writes (6 June 2009):
i am 15 aswell and i have the same problem, but the thing is my friends arent like this aswel but they understand that i like older men i like men in there early 20's not 30's, i like someone who is 23, i think the reason for your feelings for an older person is that you like to think your maturing but in some other ways you can be maturing too quickly like i have im only 15 but people think im 20 coz of my posture the way i speak they way i act and how i show my feelings. its natural its not weird you cant help who your heart is falling for, just be careful that he is respectful towards you and doesnt push you into things your not sure on!
best of luck xxxxxxxx
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A
female
reader, kitty_3 +, writes (6 June 2009):
i don't think that's fair. 35 really isn't that old!and actually, many men like younger women because of fetility reasons, etc... not all of them are out to use them. but, of course, it would be illegal in your caseand i'm 17 and if anything the guys at my school have gotten less mature... so who knows how long we'll have to wait. maybe college.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2009): Theres nothing wrong with it babe.I find old men(over 25)experienced and mature. They can also give me the emotion immature boys cant etc etc x
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy +, writes (6 June 2009):
Yes, boys your age are immature. Don't worry, they will grow up... oh okay, they won't but you will become more capable of withstanding their immaturity.
It is pretty common for girls your age to develop a crush on an older man. You are training as it were and responding to a man who has the qualities you will eventually want in your husband/father of your childeren. Maturity, reliablity, financial independance, an adults body etc etc.
Just don't mistake puppy-love for real love. You are looking at a father-figure. What else would you seek to have children with? But most likely, as you mature your tastes will shift, to someone who shares your world. Who wasn't already an adult when you were yet to be born.
The boys your age or perhaps just few years older will start to look better, they will sure as hell wheeze less when they climbed a staircase.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2009): Men that are intrested in a 15 year old at 30plus will only want you to take advantage as your young. Is that what you want? someone to control you? My 15yr old friend got with a 36yr old, he was controlling and she's still with him now. She didn't go to college or do any of the things she dreamed about doing when we were younger.
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