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female
,
anonymous
writes: I am 23 years old and have a 4 year old child. At the age of 17 I had an abortion and it was a really harrowing experience as I didn't tell anyone. Then earlier this year, I had another, but this time felt able to tell family and friends, although it still was incredibly emotionally painful. Now, I have just discovered I am pregnant again. I am so ashamed I feel totally stupid and like I can't tell anyone. I don't know why I keep getting pregnant, this is my 4th pregnancy in 7 years to 4 different men. I don't sleep around, they are always steady boyfriends, but I still feel like a whore. I am going to abort this pregnancy too as I don't love the guy it is with and don't want to be tied to him. I wish I had kept the last baby as I really did love that guy. I'm so confused.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2008): don't get rid of your baby that your carrying now even if you don't love the man that you got pregnant by i got pregnant at 13 years old by a man that i didn't love i wanted to get rid of the baby i was carrying but my older sister told me not to she said to me even if you don't love the man that your with don't take it out on your unborn baby take it out on the man that got you pregnant i keeped my baby in the end now my doughter is now 4 years old and i am now 17 years old ok so don't get rid of your unborn baby keep your unborn baby ok. from sian leanne pritchard 17 from Runcorn.
A
female
reader, ali1987 +, writes (3 October 2006):
 i cant believe your 23 and treat abortions as an everyday normality. im only 18 and know if you dont use contraception your going to end up pregnant. and by the way did you know that abortions hold a risk of you not being able to concieve in the future. what are you going to do, if one day you meet the right man and want to start a family but you cant because of all the abortions you have had. im sorry if my views come across as strong, i am prolife so dont agree with abortions, however i do realise that they are the best solution for some people, but not you. it seems you are using abortions as contraception, but thats not going to work because your already pregnant, you need to prevent the situation from happening not solve it if it does happen. and if your still not happy with using contraception then dont have sex with these men, we live in a modern world now, a woman can help herself out in that department and theres certainly no risk of getting pregnant that way. So either go to your dr or take a visit to ann summers.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (26 September 2006):
 Birth control definitely, but maybe in your case a tubal ligation would be in order.
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A
female
reader, uonlyliveonce  +, writes (26 September 2006):
 Just get the contraceptive injection or implant then you havent got to remember to take the pill everyday. i got pregnant at 17 and kept her. only reason i got pregnant is because i kept forgetting pill n me n my bf never used a condom, i was young n didnt care i'll admit it but i learnt from it why are you still making the same mistakes there isnt really a good excuse.
you seem to link the baby with the guys your seeing at the time, wether you love the father or not a baby is a new person not a walking talking reminder of someone you loved.
dont want to sound nasty but theres people who try for ages and can never have children and your throwing away these 'mistakes' everytime it happens because for some reason you dont know what to do with a condom
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A
female
reader, Toria +, writes (25 September 2006):
 Firstly I don't understand why you are getting involved with men you really don't want to be with. Secondly I don't see why you aren't doing more to stop yourself from getting pregnant all the time.
You really can't keep falling into this trap and keep aborting babies all the time it's not good for you and these are babies your just throwing away everytime you make another mistake.
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A
male
reader, Yos  +, writes (25 September 2006):
 The other two aunts are right. I'd suggest you go on the pill as soon as you can, and stay on it. This will prevent you getting pregnant, and prevent you getting into the messes you have been getting yourself into.
As for the men and relationships, all I can suggest is staying away from men you don't feel love for (and that love you). It really can be much better to be single than in a relationship with someone you don't truly care for. Over the long term in can make it harder to trust and commit to relationships, plus builds up your feelings that all your relationships are doomed to fail. Bad relationships can make it harder for us to have good relationships in the future (speaking from personal experience here).
Plus it means that when the right person does come along you are in a better position to do something about it.
But whatever you do, go on the pill. Or get an IUD if for some reason the pill is medically not an option for you.
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A
female
reader, shania +, writes (25 September 2006):
 I agree with David,if you dont want to get pregnant then you either go on the pill or use some other form of contraception.I cannot understand that you have unprotected sex with these men and then decide to have an abortion? While in certain cases abortion is necessary,this will be your 3rd one and to me that is too many.Ask yourself this...why do you need to get pregnant with every fella you meet? I suggest you go down to the family planning clinic today before you destroy your life and your unborn babies lives.
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A
male
reader, David Lewis +, writes (25 September 2006):
 Well for a start, you should be using some form of contraception if you do not want to get pregnant.
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