A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i was best friends with a girl sometime back, it was like we both were very close and the chemistry made me fall for her, i couldnt help it. Even she was close to me and used to hug me when going on bike rides, i even used to let her sleep in my arms while traveling, and she also had a boyfriend at that time. Slowly as time passed, she started saying she felt like she was cheating her boyfriend, and i respected and maintained my distance. but i expected things like a friend. she started giving two other guys more time than me, and one time when we went to a beach on vacation, she was hanging around with one of those guys and dint even bother about me. i told her frankly that i getting jealous and she freaked out. well, i thought it was genuine getting jealous when a best friend is avoiding you for someone else. After that i behaved badly, i boozed openly and i did all crap. She even told that guy why i was behaving like that. Anyways i later realised my mistake and started to handle the situation by being more matured. I tried getting her back and she even gave me an impression that she understood that i was really repenting for what i did. But she once said, we cant be the friends we were anymore. I got pissed off and she went upto the extent of saying "i never considered you as my best friend, you were only my good friend." And now she doesnt have a boyfriend and its also not like i want to take that place. All those days of arguments and fights with her lowered my self esteem a lot. I even went to a psychiatrist for getting myself treated for anxiety disorder.Ony one thing used to revolve in my mind, the girl whom i was very close to now seems to be so indifferent towards me. She asked me to politely walk away from her life when i texted her saying i was missing her. And now i dont know what i want, Part of my mind asks me to get over her and move on and the other part wants her back.But after a series of arguments with myself, i finally made up my mind to get over her and prjoect a care free attitude. But my problem is that i am dreaming about her very often now-a-days. Sometimes i dream that i am still friends with her, sometimes her friends telling me what she is thinkin about this crap, these dreams are making me think of her more now. i dont know what these dreams mean, and why i am dreaming.Last night i dreamt that we were at my house playing in the swimming pool and i dint even care to look at her and was enjoying my own way. But in reality we were to a water amusement park where she dint care about me and was into her own world of enjoyment. i dont understand why the concept of the dreams is so varying. please suggest something. i hope you wont get irritated reading my story so long.
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best friend, jealous, move on, self esteem, text Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2010): you dream about those things cause you obviously still care for her.. you want to forget her, and try to repress your feelings, but these dreams mean that you are still in love with her.. The dream in the water.. well, at the water amusement park, you were obviously feeling down because she didn't care about you then.. so u had a dream where you didn't care about her, in the similar situation.. maybe that's how you wanted it to be.. but it isn't.. it just says that you would like to get over her, but it's not that easy.. it takes time..
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2010): please don't change because of this girl. you seem like an amazing guy. i think that you should try to move on go on a couple dates see what else is out there. but if you still miss her confront her, try to say it face to face. it wouldn't hurt to do a little chasing. and honestly i would date a guy like you :) theres not many genuine nice guys who care. so don't let this girl get you down. just think about what shes missing.
hope this helped.
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