A
female
age
36-40,
*f123
writes:My boyfriend is at a different university to me and next year he is living in a group of 6 with a girl that I do not like and do not trust.This girl can be deliberately nasty and has offended most people at some point. People seem to just accept that this is the way she is but I stood up to her when she was nasty about me behind my back.She has also caused problems for her new housemates by throwing several tantrums about houses they had chosen that she didn't like. I feel that she behaves inappropriately around my boyfriend also and it makes me uncomfortable.I trust my boyfriend implicitly. We have been together for 4 years and intend to move in together when we finish uni. We are accepted as part of each others' families and everything is fantastic so why do I have such a problem with him living with this girl?Any idea what I should do?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (4 May 2007):
 Absolutely. Am sorry if I came across as a little patronising suggesting that I wouldn't be the same in your situation but when you're not involved it's sometimes difficult to see that! Good luck with everything and don't let this girl get you down!
CD
A
female
reader, gf123 +, writes (4 May 2007):
gf123 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thanks, I know you're right but in practice it's hard not to get upset about! I've spoken to my boyfriend about it and stressed my feelings. He's been really understanding and has assured me that he'll always be there to talk me round when I'm worried. I think the fact that he is really open with me is a good sign. If he were to be defensive then I'd be worried but I actually think he respects me for being honest with him.
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (3 May 2007):
Yep, trust your boyfriend. It takes two people to cheat and however inappropriate she is and however much she wants to be with your boyfriend all those feelings mean nothing if he doesn't want to be with her. Part of being in uni means living with people who aren't particularly easy or likeable. It's good training for when you come across people like that in later years. Try not to argue with this girl since it seems she likes confrontation. If she has a go at you do what her housemates do and just roll your eyes and walk away from her. That's guaranteed to wind her up way more than you weighing in. Let the housemates sort of the house issues and don't let them bother you. I'm sure you love your boyfriend and want to help him but her childishness is their problem, not yours. Stay chilled!
CD
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