A
male
age
30-35,
*amcrossdresser
writes:i am physically a male but i feel a very strong desire of wearing women's clothes and i daily wears women's bra,panty,camisole,nightie,skirt and other women's clothing.i also apply makeup such as lipstick,nailpaint etc. i do crossdressing only at home. i am not a gay and don't want to do sex change. why i do this i am also confused. please help me Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2014): It's a myth that all men who practice cross-dressing, or transvestism, are gay. Everyone has a kink, and I suppose women's clothes and makeup is yours. Not everyone understands this practice, and if you do your research; you'll discover that it has nothing to do with sexual-orientation. It isn't a gender-identity disorder or dysphoria, as people generally assume.
By and large, there are gay men who do "drag", but that is just a separate part of the gay-culture. There are many subcultures within the gay community. It is not at all a common-practice among gay men, as most would stereotype about us. The majority of us do not wish to be women, do not have gender dysphoria, and do not desire to cross-dress. You would have to read-up on psychological studies on the topic, to determine how common it is among heterosexual males. Studies have been done. The number of heterosexual men who cross-dress may surprise you.
Living in India, there is a sub-culture of gay men who do get sex-changes, and are treated as women. Wonbatu, I believe they are called. Some are shunned to some degree I've heard. Some live comfortably amongst society. I don't know if they can get pass ports, or change their birth certificates. If you don't wish to be confused with trans-gender females, just be discreet and continue to practice in the comfort and privacy of your own home.
You may have to explain your lady's wardrobe and makeup case someday. You shouldn't be surprised that some people would be shocked. I know that in traditional Indian theater, men dress and play the parts of women. So it doesn't shock the audience at all. It's not totally foreign to Asian society by any means.
Most will jump to the conclusion that you are gay. You will not find many women who are comfortable with it; but there are always special exceptions. I wouldn't share this personal-information; unless it is someone you trust implicitly, they are truly open-minded, and well informed about sexual-orientation and transvestism. Discretion would be your best option. Cultural traditions and mainstream society would categorize it as a fetish. Anything society doesn't consider a normal and acceptable practice, is going to receive criticism and rejection.
You know exactly why you desire to do it. Obviously you find pleasure in it. The secrecy of it, apparently heightens your enjoyment; and you derive pleasure in the feel of women's garments. Make-up puts the finishing touches on your transformation. Just be forewarned, finding heterosexual people with a tolerance for it may be very difficult.
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