A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I don't get why guys act hot and cold. What is the point of being like this? Is this not a form of mind games? Don't get me wrong, I know it's just not guys who act hot and cold but women do it too.I just get confused when this happens though :/. Surely if a guy blows hot and cold, he doesn't like the girl?? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, person12345  +, writes (18 January 2012):
 Either he doesn't like her or he's manipulative. Either way it's not good.
A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (18 January 2012):
 My "semi-educated' guess is; When hot he's wanting to seduce you...when cold, he's realizing the seduction failed and is the equivelant of pouting about it.
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A
male
reader, TrancedRhythmEar  +, writes (18 January 2012):
 Mixed signals are a way of men keeping women interested... so that they arent dead giveaways about what they truly think about the person. For some men they can do this naturally to attract women, for me it takes study and practice. It isnt necessarily a game, its a way of courting.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2012): That "hot and cold" idea is nothing but an excuse for a person to have their cake and eat it, too. They don't respect the heart that they are toying with. They want to make themselves feel good by being "needed" and to know they can control another person's life. Do not allow anyone to play games with your heart. That kind of behavior proves their character. You do not want to be involved with someone who will jerk you around. Might be a long time, but hold out for the respect of a mature man or woman.
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A
male
reader, LovelessAct1 +, writes (18 January 2012):
Like you said, its not just guys; plenty of women can be accused of doing this as well. Personalities differ based on the individual. Some, regardless of gender, are more frantic or non-commital when it comes to relationships and others are more classic romantics.
Why people do this is hard to pin down. My first thought would be that they have issues of committing to one person and enjoy the chase rather than the actual relationship. It also may have to do with them being hurt previously by an ex and become insecure in their ability to have a functional relationship, so they play the on/off game.
Its a mystery and it differs for everyone.
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