A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hello people ...i just had a breakup with my gf ..she was extremely loving and one of a kind..a very mature and responsible girl by her age...she really loved me from her true heart but my feelings for her changed and this was truly heart wrenching for her that we broke off ...she said im her soul and it is been separated from her body! i have hurted her in many terms but life has to move on... we have decided to take a break for about 8-10 days as we had to remain friends no matter what.....it has been only a day to our breakup ...all of the sudden a strange question rose in my mind and that has made me insecure about losing such a great girl ...why do we need to take a break ? it will kill all the feelings, affection , addiction and the closeness and slowly fade up the things...so whats the point in being friends ? do we really need to take the break in order to become friends after the breakup ? what purpose does it fulfll? cant we stay friends immediately after the breakup and talk neutral and hope to get addicted to it...maybe in this way we wont have to newly start knowing the person who used to be with us 24/7....ofcourse after 10 days her behaviour with me is unpredictable and may be i will not feel the affection in her talks....but i will always miss her love and care she has given me... will it change her personality as a whole towards me ? please guide ...its very confusing in my mind!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2009): If you broke up with her and your feelings for her changed why was there a term-limit to the "break"? It seems to me you are playing around with the idea that she'll be there when you've done whatever it is you want to do without her. You want her there as back-up. This is a very selfish, mean-spirited thing to do to someone who loves you. Break it off. Agree to be friends. Period. No term limits. No open-ended promises of possibility for a future relationship.You are breaking up with her for a reason. I can understand the term-limit if you are unsure of your feelings for her. Again, how terrible of you to expect her to wait it out while you figure out how you feel about a woman you have said is wonderful. Perhaps she should let you go completely so you can work on your self-esteem.Stay friends. Break up. Date other people. Be good to each other.
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