A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: i recently met up with a girl i knew from 5th grade and been hanging around with her the past couple weeks and i am really starting to like her a lot the other night we had sex but heres my problem she already has a boyfriend i want her to be with me why do you think she had sex with me does that mean she is attracted to me or was it just a one time thing please help i really like this girl
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, ThatsMyCookie +, writes (31 December 2010):
However much you may be crazy about this girl at the moment, you could be looking at her through crush tinted spectacles and need to slow down.
Take time to think about the toes your treading on and the people who could get hurt in this - which, although you're thinking of her boyfriend, it's actually you who could suffer the most.
Have you considered the fact that she slept with you even though she has a boyfriend, which means she cheated? The huge majority of people who have cheated in the past are likely to do it again. Do you really want a cheater for a girlfriend?
Focus on her bad points. It may sound awful, but you should try to pick up on the things about her that you don't really like that much, or that annoying little thing she does that gets to you. Then you'll start to see her in a more balanced light.
And don't forget about her boyfriend! Have you ever had a cheating partner in the past? How did you feel? Angry? Upset? Betrayed? How did you look at your partner after it - selfish? Lying? Nasty?
You need to see the girl this way - she has done exactly the same to her boyfriend.
I hope this has helped steady you a little bit. If, in the end, you do decide to sleep with her again, I hope you know inside that it is the best thing for both of you and not just her/you.
:)
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