A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend knows I have trust issues because of a past relationship where an ex cheated on me and broke my heart.So he went ahead an unfriended about half the people on his FB page to "make me happy". It started off with me questioning why this one girl from another country liked his profile pic and who was she. He said he does not know her. That when he started his job a couple years back he was friending everybody in his industry. So he unfriended all the people he does not know personally. About half his friends.Why would he do this? He never did it before and they have been on his page for years.Please note I NEVER ASKED HIM TO. But I did tell him I cannot stay in this relationship if I am always worried and my worries get the best of me.
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female
reader, like I see it +, writes (15 May 2015):
 Assuming there are no past trust issues in your relationship with him, most likely he decided having strangers on his friends list wasn't worth the potential interrogation from you.
Unless of course he has a history of cheating on previous partners, in which case unfriending the strangers might be a SHOW of good faith to cover up inappropriate goings-on with someone he DOES know in person - he can look like he's compromised while not really having given up anything.
Either way, it seems more likely a response to the insecurities you say came out than an independent desire of his to suddenly delete half his friends list. That's why he would do it "now" after 2 years - sounds like it took 2 years to become an issue.
Good luck and best wishes.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2015): Your trust issues... not his. He was being nice and good to you becauase he obviously cares about you so don't question it. You say that you did not ask him to delete but you make him know that you will not stay in the relationship if you have worries then of course he had to delete!!
It's not his place to alleviate or reassure your insecurities. I have severe trust issues so I know. And NOTHING that you say or WORRY about will stop him cheating if he's going to...
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2015): Hi janniepeg, its the OP.
No, not asking if he has anything to hide.
If he did, he would have unfriended these friends long ago... we have been together for 2 years.
So why now?
I think it is because as you said, he wants to stay in this relationship and is doing what he can to try and alleviate my concerns.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (15 May 2015):
 Maybe he wants to stay in this relationship?
Are you asking if he's unfriended people because he had lots to hide? Such as flirtations online that he doesn't want you to see and cause worries?
Unless he has shown himself to be a player, people would find it easy to delete if the friends on there are rather insignificant.
Without knowing anything about him, I am still inclined to believe he did it so you won't feel so worried, and that he would work with you to remove any triggers.
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A
male
reader, Xearo  +, writes (14 May 2015):
True you did not asked him to, but rather you forced him to unfriend those people. It is not really a good idea to drag insecurities from a past relationship. All it does is open a bag of worms, and sets the tone of the rest of the relationship to come. Trust is some that is meant to be earned. You can not demand it. After all, why should he trust you when you have not done anything to earn it.
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