A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My ex boyfriend dumped me for a girl he spoke to online, who lives in America, who he has never met in person. My ex and I live in England. We were together on and off for six years. I haven't contacted him for six weeks ( we've been broken up for seven weeks though ) . He didn't contact me either, but last night, i went on a website that we both like going on, and where we used to send private messages to each other, and i noticed he had sent me a message !. He actually sent it a couple of weeks ago, but i have only just seen it as i have been quite busy lately, and hadn't checked my messages before last night. I'm not sure why he sent the messsage on there though, instead of phoning or texting me. He said " Well, i hope that your life is better , and that you are happy, i really do ". He didn't say whether anything had gone wrong with that girl or not, or whether he wanted me back or not, but it shows he was thinking of me. I'm not sure what the right thing is to do though, whether i should write back or not. I'm not really sure what to say. I still miss him, but he really hurt me with what he did. What do you think? I also want to add that we hadn't seen each other for a while when i last saw him, and he told me that he wanted to give me another chance ( he had been undecided then about what he wanted to do about us ), and i went to his place and we even did intimate things together. However, the next day, he said he didn't want to be with me, and said he had strong feelings for the online girl. They had only been in contact for a week then, and he lied to me at first and said he only liked her as a friend.I'm not sure whether to play it cool and act like i'm not upset or angry, or tell him the truth about how i am feeling, or if i shouldn't contact him at all. I do want to know why he wrote to me though.I'm wondering why he has only sent one message too, unless he thinks i am ignoring him because i haven't go back to him yet.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (23 June 2011):
 Honestly it sounds like this guy is bad news and I think that you are best to completely avoid him and don't bother contacting him again. It is clear that he doesn't care much about you because if he did he would not have left you for a girl he was talking to on the internet for a week. This shows that he does not have strong feelings for you and that he is not ready for anything to serious.
He probably wrote to you to see if you would reply and maybe see if you would forgive him so that he doesn't feel bad. But honey if you forgive him well then he will only keep finishing with you and coming back to you. He will never settle down with you am afraid. So avoid all contact and find a man that deserves your love and attention.
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