A
female
age
41-50,
*rincess77
writes:ok here it goes i need some advice on this please i dont know what to do? I have been with this guy for a long long time and things werent ever that great or so i became to realize. WE never had sex that much and it didnt bother me that much cause i never had amazing sex let alone been loved by a man. I found out he likes anal stimulation and likes to use toys but he dont know i know. He likes to watch porn all kinds shemale and guys and likes to jerk of to men and vice versa and i dont understand why. I asked him about the watching porn and says everyone does it and they dont. he cant please anyone but himself its always about him and what he wants. why why why . and to top of it of i came home from work and i saw from the window that he was pulling up his pants so he got caught and didnt realize it . It hurts me to know that my husband would rather jerk of to some fake porn sight and not even care about my needs or what i want . i feel betrayed angry disgusted. And honeslty im really fed up with it all. Why cant he for once ask me what i want and need and learn to love me and please me give me the orgasim i never had. What is so wrong with me that he dont want anything to do with me anymore its not like im fat and ugly and dont take care of myself. Im so torn apart over the whole marriage its a loveless marriage . pleaase help me
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2015): yes u might be right but i need to try to get over it so i can deal with it and move past it so i can tolerate it till i can get out of the marriage. But I do resent him for it cause it has pushed me away from him and i cant form any sex act on him without thinking that he is fantasying about the girls or men in the porn.I am trying to understand it and i cant and that is part of why it hurts. Plus him taking vows to me and not following through with them like the women said in previous comment he went in with no desire to make me happy. I dont think he cared enough. And its sad and sick.
A
male
reader, Been there Now over it +, writes (3 November 2015):
It appears he is bi-sexual and perhaps has a greater attraction to males and shemales (rather than women). In any case, he is beyond selfish and you aren't going to change him. This obviously bothers you a great deal...you'll need to leave him and find someone else if you'll ever get the satisfaction you crave.
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A
female
reader, princess77 +, writes (3 November 2015):
princess77 is verified as being by the original poster of the question but why it hurts . i feel so betrayd and hurt why get married if u dont want to be with a woman. i dont get it. but im tired of not being loved. And how do i know the other guys wont do the same. What is the true meaning of love though like really .. I am not sure if i know what love really is but i know what the marriage isnt. How can i deal with it till i can get out. Im so tired of living a lye.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (3 November 2015):
 It's not that if women are beautiful then they automatically get good sex. The man has to be in good shape, mentally and physically and in the right sexual orientation. Many people get married to feel normal. I don't think he went into this with the desire to make you happy. It's easy to propose to a woman, to live with her, because that's what the majority of women want and what society expects. It's hard to find a shemale, or be in a homosexual relationship if he's conflicted about his body or what he wants in life. Princess, you are still young enough to find love and passion. This marriage is a sham, a cover.
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