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male
,
anonymous
writes: I can't forget about my awful teenage years. Recently I split up with a girl I've been with since I was 22, over 4 years ago. I lost my virginity to her. But I found increasingly that I felt sad about the past especially the teenage years. During those years I could barely speak to girls and although I kissed quite a lot, even had a girlfriend for a year when I was 11/12 (she was my age), when i hit the teens I just couldn't communicate, I went depressed and into myself. I had a chance at 16 to get with a girl and I couldn't do it, I hugged, kissed her but afterwards during the next few months I just couldn't bring myself to talk to her. It was terrible and another guy basically took her away from me, basically having sex with her and his girlfriend at the same time, while I had to wait another 6 years. I was rejected at 19, when I managed to talk well to a girl, she didn't like me, really bad luck. I've found that now I can't stay with the girl who I probably should stay with, I feel I want to make up for the bad years and need more experience. So I've recently got an 18 year old girlfriend, she's great and we get on really well, but already she's had about 5 boyfriends and lots of sex, so while feeling great I feel so bad and depressed about my past and can't understand it, I'm quite good looking but why I was so shy with no confidence is inexplicable. Is it normal for me to feel like this and what can I do about it? Is anybody else out there with similar feelings?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2006): thanks, yes everything is ok now with regards girls, they all like me, it's just a case of feeling sad about the past, I can't get it out of my mind
A
female
reader, Phoebe Halliwell  +, writes (2 September 2006):
 Hey There,
you probably can't get past your teenage years because you've seen other people doing stuff with girls so easily it's put you down and you just lost all your confidence then. Which, as a result of that, has given you no confidence now. Some girls don't go for looks. Some, mostly the good ones may I add, look at what's inside you. You're a little bit shy, and good looking, what girl wouldn't want you?
Keep looking, you'll find the perfect girl eventually and she'll love you for who you are and you'll forget your teenage tragidies and look forward to the future you have, together.
Phoebe xxxxx
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