A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have an uneasy situation.There's a guy who would suppose to be just a brother to me. Our relationship is like he is my sworn brother. I rarely talk to him cuz I feel a little shy with boys.Then one day his friends and him decided to make a feast for their brothers and sister ( this thing is complex but it is the way it's going on around here). I was invited and I know it is normal that he didn't want me to deny or just call it of. But he kept asking me too many time!All of his friends and his brother too just kept teasing him with that he's with me. Like how he acted strangely that day or something like he had chosen his clothing very carefully. After that feast it is another cerebration and it's time to sing. Me, my sister and my brother had to sing a song. He did choose something that means " I will stop everything just to be with you" but who would notice the meaning? Am I that stupid? I chose another song that is familiar and very plain. Did I ruin his plan?Before we sang his friend, yet again teasing about he must sing together with me. That's when he turned red. Not only that my sister too seems to know something in this odd. She didn't even speak a word when we sang but kept the mic. with my brother. So we sang together. I feel quite nothing toward this but it makes me feel uneasy that's all. I don't want to be this miserable by these questions of did he like me or not. Or something like is he real for me. He's always being nice to me and cares fir every bit of mine.I want the answer and I know I can't lose him. Not this life.This thing makes me heartache as well as headache. Why can't he be just a good brother to me?I do like him in a way that sister could have a feeling for her brother. I don't know what happens next if our relationship is developed but ended up with tear. Like I said I can't lose him. Help! I need some advices please.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 December 2009): Sorry that I didn't make myself clearer. He is my senior at my school.A year older. And there's a thing that we do in my hood like a senior take care of the junior in his/her responsible. So I say it is mostly like a sworn brother.
He's not my relative. We have never met before until I have been in the school.
I have just happened to be that junior of him. This is random.
Or like you said I may be thinking about this too much. Too obsessed about it.
And the situation continues like this...
Days after I posted this, my friends accidentally heard about what he said to his friends. They mentioned my name too often and something like "why don't you ask her out" and "so now you are studying about her" or something like he said "we will see what happens on this Valentine's"
I think about it quite enough to consider it as he really want to get in.
I had been in the situation quite the same. It started with gossips and that person had quite the same reactions. Unfortunately that I had denied that boy too. After that, no more conversation between us. The difference is that boy was my friend but he's not. I had regret for what I did. I felt sorry for him, but I just can't.
I did mention about afraid to lose him. Again, I think about it too much that what if he really wanted me that way and I denied him, how could I face him again? If it's like that would he ever talk to me again?
I can't lose him that way. I can't stand that.
But it is definitely not that kind of feeling.
It's all I can say here this time.
By the way I appreciate all of your comments. It helps me a lot. Those things you said enlarge my perception and make me now looking back to myself that the one who is burning in fire is me, I set the fire myself. Over thinking.
Looking for the signs? Yes I do and that because I'm cautious about the future. I admit that I'm afraid of that thing and I don't want it with anyone. It is something that can be called a mental problem I suppose.
Do you get some more ideas?
Thanks.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 December 2009): If he's your real brother then why do you talk about "loosing him"? I am confused to. Is he your brother or not? If he IS your real blood-related brother, than any relationship shouldn't happen. Whatever is "plans" are I think you are over-thinking things. As far as I can see he has done nothing to indicate that he wants a relationship with you either. The other siblings of his might be teasing, but he himself has done nothing. And you're reading way too much into the singing thing.
If he is NOT your real brother, you only feel like he is, then decide for yourself: do you want a relationship with this man or not? It honestly sounds as if you want a relationship, the way you keep looking for signs that aren't really there. If you want a relationship: simply tell him. If you dont want a relationship: don't do anything until he actually does something.
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A
female
reader, kleinie  +, writes (15 December 2009):
Im a little confused, do yous have the same parents or is this one of the occaisions where yous are so close he is like your brother?
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