A
female
age
26-29,
*adylula
writes:ok so here it is i got a new music teacher in year nine who i fell head over heals for but he left at the end of year nine and then his replacement came in and im in love with this man who is "about" 27 and ive just not long turned 15 but i dream about him i think about him all the tim he is great to talk to and he is probably the only guy i know that looks at me the way he does but i guess the real question is well i have more than one:i dont find guys my own age attractive i always go for the much much older ones i even find my 45 yearold performing arts teacher slightly atractive so the first question is am i alone and how do i aproche this im just so lost i dont know what to do and the other one is am i right to like these men or am i wierd because of the age gap my mum thinks that im looking for a farther figure in these men seen as my dad left when i was nine but i know its not because im sexually attracted to these men please help me Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2010): Physical attractions and emotional maturity are not the same thing. It's normal for teen girls to be attracted to grown men but that doesn't make it a good idea to act on it. What produces the healthiest offspring is not always what produces the healthiest relationships.
I know that's hard, but that's part of growing up. the most mature thing you can do is learn to handle your attractions in the best interests of yourself in the long term.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2010): I think you'll find alot of girls your age like guys that age, I did. The reason for this is because you're going through puberty big time. You're a young woman now not a little girl where as boys are more or less still little 'boys' because they don't grow up as quick as females which is why girls tend to loose their virginity at a younger age etc. Plus the reason why alot of lads around your age are still so immature.
The reason I didn't fancy anyone my own age was because they were far too immature where as I was very matture for my age and they looked to much of a boy for me. I liked the older, matture, manly type.
This isn't weird at all, you're just growing up. When you get to about 17 you will stop liking men so old and start liking boys around your own age or a little older.
I've never actually been out with anyone my own age, i'm 17 now and still find 17 year olds immature. I've always gone out with older guys and i'm now with a guy who's 22 who I love to bits.
I think maybe you will end up like that. Don't worry it's all part of growing up. Just don't take it to seriously and get in to deep with very older guys, they will most likley be perverts at that age and you age.
All the best.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2010): Girls mature faster than boys do. The boys your age may not have hit puberty yet, and you are already a young woman. It's no wonder that you are attracted to adult men because they look like men rather than the underdeveloped boys in your class.
Just keep in mind that it's okay to admire and "crush on" the older men, but just don't get hung up on them. Admiring them is like admiring a celebrity. It's harmless and fun---unless you become a creepy stalker. :)
Be patient with guys your own age and enjoy their friendship. By the time they're 17 or so, most of them are starting to look and act more mature.
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