A
male
age
26-29,
*ot guy with game
writes:Hi I'm 16 and for some odd reason I can't get a girlfriend I have good grades I'm not a nerd I play football I try asking them out and the always say "no" or "I'm not ready" then like a few weeks later there dateing someone else and or if they are dating me they cheat on me help!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 February 2012): Meh... I wouldn't worry too much. It seems like a biggie now, but most people find out that High School flings are pretty lame compared to the ones we have when we're grown enough to understand that you can't just go out with someone for a day or two and move on to the next one within the same timeframe.
Keep doing what you've been doing and eventually you'll find the women who DON'T like being treated like shit, they are out there.
Flynn 24
A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (21 February 2012):
 Because what girls want most (especially at your age) is a man with social savvy and too much confidence. Good grades or bad, doesn't mean a thing to them (but keep up your studies anyway). Football is only one facet of the confidence and social savvy - either a contributor or an indicator, but not a substitute (which is why the quarterback gets more action than the linemen; he's got the glamorous risky leadership position).
That, and those girls are generally more concerned with being liked than being honest (they do want relationships, just not with you, but aren't willing to risk being disliked for it).
Read the following article. I think it'll help get you started on developing and refining the kinds of traits that will help.
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/how-to-be-attractive-a-beginners-guide-for.html
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A
male
reader, Masterofpuppets +, writes (21 February 2012):
 Dude, this is A tough question to answer because I find it difficult giving advice on A topic with so many textbook clichés. Such as, maybe you're not ready , you haven't found the right one ect,ect. Being young is tough this I know and finding A young lady to date is even tougher. I'm not sure why you haven't found the right one so to speak and I am quite sure she exist's but for some reason or another you haven't crossed paths. I would like to tell you not to try so hard and never under any circumstances look, act or appear to be desperate it's an instant turn off to all women and most women wont date you if you have dated one of their friends. I am not sure where you interact with these girls you are trying to see but I assume it's at school, that can be an issue because if you are seeing someone and it goes wrong and she starts to talk badly about you every girl in that school will most likely avoid you like the plague. Give it time and try new people places and things, there's A great deal of women out there my friend and one is out there waiting on you for sure sometimes this stuff takes time. I didn't really start dating until I was like 17 and I had this idea that something was wrong with me and then all the sudden I had girls asking for my number all the time, that's the honest truth, don't get discouraged and be patient it will work out I promise you that.
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A
female
reader, Dear Mandy  +, writes (21 February 2012):
 HI
sorry to hear your having a hard time :(
sometimes though we are just not everyones type, but hold on in there, because there is someone for everyone. Instead of asking a girl out, why not try to get to know her better first, find a girl who has the same interests as you so you have mutual things to talk about, slowly build that up then after a few months or so then ask her if she would like to go pictures, or a football game?? The girls that cheat on you are not worth worrying about, if thats how they want to be then your better off without them :) are you being overly nice to girls when your with them ie doing what ever they say or want to please them? if so try not to be so eager, this can make a girl feel like your her lapdog and will walk all over you. Try not to be vacant for these girls, just be yourself and that should be enough, if its not then its not the right girl .
hope this helps
Mandy xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2012): Hi :)
Good for you, you are trying! Don't give up. It's a patience game, like fishing ;-)
Believe me, you have lots of time. You may be comparing to your friends, or others at school, or movies, but there is no rush. This is the time for you to enjoy the freedom of being 16, and chasing your dreams. Clearly having a girlfriend is one of those, but don't be in a rush.
Keep up the good grades (well done) keep enjoying football, and all the things life has to offer, and one day one of those girls you ask, WILL say YES. The right one will come along, at the right time. Isn't it better to wait and get the right one, then one who may change her mind a few weeks later or cheat on you?
In the meantime, keep discovering who you are, what you want to do in life, what your goals and dreams are, so when you have a girlfriend, you can share that with her. Be curious and learn about what is happening in the world, so you can relate it in conversations. Pursue your other interests too, and in no time, she will appear when you least expect it.
Enjoy the search, be patient, there is someone for everyone ;-) In my case, it took a lonnnnnnnng time, but it was so worth the wait :) You will be glad you waited.
All the best for you,
xxxx E
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