A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Where do I start off? I'm just always aloneeeeeeeeee! I'm pushing 20 and I'm a very pretty girl. But I want a boyfriend. I don't get it, I only had 1 boyfriend and ugh that was when I was 17. I don't care for him at all. But I want male attention, I mean yes I know I'm pretty, funny, great personality, I love to look nice. But that's not enough for me. I haven't talk on the phone with no guys in almost 9 months or spent time with one. I feel so lame, like everybody around me have somebody but me. I've been waiting but I don't want to be 40 until I have a boyfriend or have sex ( pleasing myself does not feel good to me, I perfer a guy ) I don't believe that stupid sayings "there's somebody for everyone" or "when you go out looking, you find nothing" then what do I do? Walk outside naked???? Yes I do go out sometimes but still nothing!! I've thought about being gay but I don't like girls at all, lol. I love me but dang, why can't nobody else can? I don't want to settle for less meaning have a boyfriend with no job, no in school, not my type, have kids or carless or dirty. I have a job, I start school in march, I don't. have kids, car I'm 500 dollars away from 1 and my mom is going to give me that. And I'm super clean. Yeah I know I'm lameeee I feel ugly. So what do I do? Wait or give up? Settle for less? Get on the internet and fall "in love" with a guy I'm never going to meet? And I feel real bad now because around this time I had some guy to talk too or have fun with. But I have no guys. And by me being alone, this makes me miss the last guy I had and we don't even talk anymore. Wow right?
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 January 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI'm sure I will fit in at collgege I'm very nice cool and also funny. And I said I don't want to fall in love because I don't want to enter a relationship thinking he's going to be "the one" for me. I had a sex buddy and it ended bad we never spoke again after 8 months or being good friends and sex buddys so they don't really work. I would have to no like the guy I'm having sex with.
A
female
reader, maverick494 +, writes (24 January 2011):
Okay, you lost me here. So you want a guy because you need a change of scenery? You want to cuddle but you don't want to fall in love? You want to flirt and have sex and have this guy come along on parties and dates? That's not a boyfriend, that's a friend with benefits. You'll have virtually no trouble finding one. Go to any club or cafe dressed to kill with some nice cleavage and flirt. That's all you need to do. Lots of guys are looking for sex with no emotional ties.
If a little fun is all you're after, you'll have no trouble finding it, trust me. Unless secretly you're hoping to find more than that...
Why be so cynical about college? Do you have any idea how many people you'll meet there? If you fit in well, you'll probably go out with a couple of those classmates in the future, who can introduce you to some of their hopefully interesting friends.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI want a boyfriend so I can have somebody to hang with or go out on dates even flirt with. I don't like being around females all the time. I don't mind but I like having a guy around me sometimes. And then I'm horny lmao but I do want a boyfriend. I'm just always alone and yes I love my family and bestfriends but I want to cuddle with a guy or hug or whatever. I'm not trying to fall in love or have kids, I don't want niether of that. So that's the Reason. So how long do I walk around happy and horny? Wait until I'm 60? Your saying wait? I am!! Don't be impatient? And don't go out there looking then what do I do? And the school thing I just doubt that 100%!! So at school a female friend of mine can hook me up with a guy but don't go out looking?
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A
female
reader, maverick494 +, writes (24 January 2011):
You know, guys are easily intimidated by pretty girls. Just like some girls think pretty guys are out of their league, guys can can have the same thing. And then they don't even bother. There was this interview with a gorgeous model from a while back (I think it was Adriana Lima) who said she barely got approached by guys. So you see, looks are not a failsafe way to get together with someone.
Also, pretty girls barely get told that they're pretty because people figure they must get that all the time. It's not like in the movies where the most gorgeous girl has a flock of guys following her every move.
Looking good can be a handy tool if you know its drawbacks. So come on, don't start doubting yourself now. Don't over analyze every event either. How do you act when you and your friend encounter guys? Is she the one who takes the initiative, who starts talking? Or is she the one they know and you're an anonymous face to them? Then that's why they're paying more attention to her than you. So put your foot in the door, show yourself. Contribute to the conversation.
Also, what is exactly the reason you want a boyfriend so badly? Is it because you feel out of place compared to your peers? Do you want to fit in? Do you feel lonely and crave the company of a boyfriend? These are all wrong reasons to get one. You should never set out "to get a boyfriend" because you'll end up with someone who's probably not a good match.
When people say "don't give up" or "you will find someone" they don't mean that in a dismissive, mocking way. They mean for you to move on with your life and don't get stuck in a rut somewhere. School is starting soon, even if you don't find someone there it will put you into contact with many people, people who have friends and acquaintances they can introduce you to.
You said: "I don't believe that stupid sayings "there's somebody for everyone" or "when you go out looking, you find nothing" then what do I do? Walk outside naked?"
Well that's a sure way to get yourself raped by some creep. I know you meant it sarcastically, but I'm being serious here: DO NOT EVER SERVE YOURSELF ON A PLATE because the only guys who are interested in that are those looking for a one night stand. Stores are not good places to look for guys either.
What I'm trying to say is that if you want guys to see you as girfriend material, act like girfriend material. Show that you have something that others don't. A personality, a life that doesn't revolve around finding that last piece of the puzzle (love) to make you complete. Don't be impatient either because it will only work the other way.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI understand what you all are saying; but I still feel lame. Like how can I walk around thinking I'm so pretty all the time when no guys are talking to talk to me? I am happy I just feel like I'm young so shouldn't I be having fun? Living my life? Having differennt guys to call and hang out with? And today I went out and 2 guys tried to talk to my bestfriend and not me!! How should I feel now? Like the most beautiful young lady in the world? Ha! I think not!!! Ugh this sucks and I doubt ill find somebody @ school. Plz I can't even get a man @ a store. Maybe I'm giving myself to much credit about how I look. Idk anymore.
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A
female
reader, maverick494 +, writes (23 January 2011):
OFirst off: lose the exclamation point that’s constantly hovering above your head. If you seem desperate guys will avoid you. Even if you think you don’t show it, you do. People are perceptive when it comes to that. Guys don’t want to fill the void of loneliness. They want someone who is already happy and add to the happiness. For that to happen, they need an independent girl, not a clingy girl who will drag them down to the bottom of the ocean. So do stuff. You’re free to do whatever you want, remember. No quality time with boyfriend means more time to do other things like hobbies, sports and travelling. Look on the bright side of being single.
Also, why aren’t you talking to guys? If it’s because you’re between schools, then that problem will be solved in March. If you go out, don’t scan the place for potential relationship material. Just consider every guy like you do with everyone else: someone to kill time with, talk to, not necessarily get together with. If you start relaxing, it will show in how you carry yourself and everything will become easier. Also, you’re not even 20 yet, so I don’t understand the big deal. Just because teenage central is littered with sluts who can’t keep their mouth shut about their sexual escapades, doesn’t mean there aren’t a whole lot of people like you out there who aren’t in such a hurry.
Don’t set too high standards either. If you don’t give some guys a chance to show what they can be, you might be missing out on someone great. In this economical crisis many people are jobless. So don’t condemn everyone who is: they might be working very hard to get one.
Lastly, don’t contradict yourself. If you start out by saying you’re pretty and end with how you feel lame and ugly, you’re not giving a clear image of yourself. Don’t be the girl who knows she’s got the goods but puts herself down in front of others because she thinks that will make her come across as humble. It doesn’t, it only makes her come across as pretentious. It’s a good thing to know your qualities. So don’t be afraid to be confident. If you’re genuine, confidence is a real good attribute to have. Guys like it.
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A
female
reader, petina1  +, writes (23 January 2011):
 I'll bet y uo anything once you start school in March it will all fall in to place. Someone is there waiting for you. Attend as many parties as y ou can, meet other girls to hang around with. The age that you are at now can be the best years of your life. It's all coming at you soon, trust me.
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2011): well if ur a beautiful women than surely you have a que of gorgeus men out there waiting for you , maybe your just not looking in the rite places go out clubbing try out new things to meet new people , your young so you ve got plenty of time to find the perfect guy . good luck xx :)
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